Compatibility problem: bosses, colleagues, subordinates.

Can you work with a person you personally dislike?

What efforts are you making?

Psychological compatibility can be defined as a form of expression of reciprocity or “fair exchange” in relationships between people. There are objective circumstances that contribute to incompatibility, and subjective ideas about it that can be successfully overcome.

Psychological compatibility in business communication is mutual acceptance and coordination of a\ social roles, b\ functional-role expectations, c\ interests and motivations

Psychological compatibility generally requires: common interests, mutual sympathy, absence of egocentric attitudes, readiness and ability to get along with another person. Psychological compatibility in business communication is determined by the dominant orientation towards solving the problem. As has already been said, in business communication the desire to communicate is secondary to the need, so psychologically partners are prepared for the fact that unpleasant moments may arise in the process of interaction. Consequently, the requirements for psychological compatibility in business communication are lower than in personal communication.

On the other hand, we do not like people who are unpleasant to us and are not friends with them, while in a group, organization, team, the opportunity to choose exclusively pleasant partners is zero. Therefore, it is worth distinguishing between the psychological compatibility of partners from their own subjective point of view, the psychological compatibility that is necessary or sufficient to solve business problems, and the psychological compatibility that is present or absent from the point of view of an outside observer. The problem is how to be a pleasant person yourself, how to work with unpleasant people and how to perceive conflicts and conflicting personalities.

Psychological compatibility can be expressed in the compatibility of personality traits (choleric and phlegmatic) and psychological attitudes (the main thing is work).

In individual practice, we adapt to each other intuitively, but here, too, certain patterns can be identified. Let's look at them in a little more detail.

When two people interact, at least 6 types of influence are identified, showing the primary compatibility or incompatibility of the partners.

We feel good together. Mutual relief - “and you also cannot solve this problem.” Partners are compatible simply because their communication is comfortable for both.

Mutual difficulty - “we interfere with each other.” They are incompatible. Possibly subjective.

One-sided relief - “I help you, but you don’t help me.” Partners are compatible because one receives help, and the other feels superior and important.

One-sided difficulty - “you bother me, but I don’t bother you.” And here compatibility is due to the difference in psychological reaction to the situation. One of the partners does not feel discomfort from communication, and the second may be satisfied with his ability to tolerate inconvenience.

Asymmetrical relief - “it’s easier for you with me, but it’s harder for me with you. “The situation is similar to the previous one.

Independence – “We both don’t care.” Compatibility exists in the form of mutual indifference.

Mutual hostility - “We can’t stand each other.”

Psychological compatibility may be the result of the complementarity of partners. Such compatibility in business communication is called workability. The workability is as follows: 1. In complementary functions, that is, two people can meet different needs joint activities. For example, one of the partners is able to quickly solve the problem, and the second is able to critically evaluate the solution methods and show the emerging prospects. 2. To satisfy a common need, for example, both partners psychologically need to discuss the problem before starting to work on its solution. 3. In the contrasting properties and qualities of partners, which allow you to effectively solve the problem. For example, a man and a woman. 4. The need for different rewards for work. For example, one needs money, and another needs fame. It should be noted that in cases No. 1 and No. 3, partners often have to be convinced that they are compatible, since the difference in psychological reactions causes natural mutual irritation. Consequently, objective psychological compatibility and its awareness are not the same thing and require not only intuitive adaptation, but also volitional correction of attitude and behavior.

Psychological incompatibility - 1 denial of my role or lack of opportunities to harmonize motivations, interests, fundamental differences in emotional reactions and behavioral styles. For example, a choleric person and a melancholic person, a performer and a critic, people with an inferiority complex and creative people are incompatible because they have diametrically opposed personal orientations. Incompatibility is when a person threatens my “I” with his existence or his behavior, and this threat cannot be eliminated according to my, his and even our common desire.

If you work in an organization, in a group, in a team, you can identify some psychological types of potentially compatible and incompatible people:

Compatible in principle or people who are successful in communication:

Successful communication.

High contact – positive aspects and costs

Contact: adaptive, leaders, trusting, situationally shy.

People striving for leadership, capable of solving common problems, subordinating others to themselves.

Collectivists who feel the need for common work, mutual support, and are loyal to the company and organization.

Adaptable, feeling secure in the presence of a leader and group.

Incompatible or " difficult people" Who is hard to work with and who is difficult? manage.

Lazy people: they simply don’t like to work, they don’t do enough. Workaholics, making themselves a “victim”, oppressing with their activity.

Emotionally incompatible with a partner or with a group: Angry, there is a “wave” of ill will coming from them; excitable, they introduce an element of psychological instability; insensitive, they do not provide a natural emotional background of empathy.

Immoral.

Helpless: unable to do anything, afraid to act, victims of circumstances .

Self-confident. Egoists, focused only on personal gain.

Intimidated, evasive, bitter, defensive.

Individualists who strive to act alone

People who, in principle, are focused only on completing a task and do not want to take into account the problems of others.

Defective communication

Difficulties communication

Destructive communication: lies, hypocrisy, deception, selfishness. Aggressiveness.

We have to admit that there are much more “difficult” people. Consequently, the more important is the art of managing oneself and working with those whom fate has sent as partners.

Particular attention should be paid to the group of conflict-ridden people.

4. Compatibility is determined and strengthened by mutual actions to maintain good relationships and “save face” of the partner. “Face” is the social significance claimed by a person in a specific situation and given role. What matters is whether other people feel the need to support these demands. In everyday business communication, it is extremely desirable to have psychological confirmation that you consider your boss to be a boss, your colleague to be a colleague, and your subordinate to be a person, an individual, and an interesting person.

5.The quality invariably desired in a business partner is reliability. IN In business communication, the reliability of a partner is the fundamental attitude that you can rely on the actions and words of another person.

The reliability of a partner is determined by both his role and the content of the joint activities:

For a boss, the reliability of a subordinate is manifested not only in responsibility, integrity and diligence. But also in his loyalty to the company.

For work colleagues, each other's reliability is determined by mutual obligations in work, as well as in a certain ethics of relationships with the boss.

In principle, for each of us there is a concept of “a pleasant person” and a concept of “an unpleasant person.” Is it possible to say that certain types of people are more pleasant than others?

2. People who are pleasant in character - generous, sociable, decisive, sincere. Although the vast majority of people strive to hide their motives and feelings, the same majority prefers sincerity to all other qualities of a business partner. This paradox is explained by the natural desire for direct contacts, the desire to simplify and facilitate the process of making any decision. Determination, sociability and generosity are attractive as a counterbalance to weakness, isolation and greed.

3. Sometimes they say: “He’s just a nice person.” As a rule, this means non-conflict, gentleness, kindness, and a sense of humor.

You can also identify psychological traits or types that cause hostility.

Unpleasant type No. 1 - narcissistic, arrogant, arrogant, demonstrating a lack of interest in you.

Unpleasant type No. 2 - dogmatic, intolerant, contradictory all the time.

Unpleasant type #3 - a two-faced or insincere person.

It is difficult to assume that we will always and in all cases work only with pleasant people. Therefore, it is necessary to learn to interact with unpleasant people and achieve success in joint activities.

If a person is unpleasant to YOU, then you can try:

disconnect as much as possible from personal relationship and strictly adhere to formal rules of communication.

analyze the situation and try to change your attitude towards your unpleasant partner.

You can also suggest several ways to correct your behavior depending on the role in the group or organization that the unpleasant person plays. People you can’t do without and about whom you can’t help but think: bosses, colleagues, subordinates.

Unpleasant type #1 - Your boss. In relation to him it is preferable maximum clarity in work and unburdened flattery.

If this is your colleague, then it is quite possible, with the help of jokes, irony, as well as a convincing demonstration of your professional competence, to lower his self-esteem and bring down his arrogance.

In relationships with a type 1 subordinate, it is worth making an unobtrusive but reasoned comparison of his work with the successes of others, which will lead to the result described above.

If you are dealing with unpleasant type No. 2, then regardless of his role the best is to distance as much as possible.

If your boss is an unpleasant type No. 3, then you should seek protection from it from higher authorities or rely on the collective opinion of colleagues. At the same time, personal protection is again high professionalism.

When communicating with a two-faced colleague or subordinate, a one-time or ongoing demonstration of awareness of the actual state of affairs is desirable.

How to be pleasant yourself? There are many ways to attract positive attention: regularly submit reports to your boss or manager about your achievements for the month and a plan for the next, become an expert in a certain field, come to work earlier and leave later than others, sincerely praise and thank everyone who helps you, speak at conferences and seminars, engage in social activities. Thus, psychological compatibility and workability with your boss, colleagues and subordinates depends both on objective situations and the personal properties of these people, and on your efforts to optimize the situation.

So, if you want to succeed in a group, use the following strategies:

Search for interested parties - people who have reasons and a desire to resolve some issue with the result you want.

Working in the comfort zones of other people - everyone has their own system of values ​​and motivations - you will be pleasant if you do not threaten to destroy it, but, on the contrary, confirm its significance.

When solving any issue with a woman, you need to please her.

To improve communication, think about your partner's motives and use this knowledge.

What if the strategy doesn't work? Set a goal to improve the situation.

Avoid the desire to punish the other side: people’s actions are their actions, and your feelings about this are your feelings. That is, there is no need to say: “You offended me,” it is better to say: “I am offended when you do this.”

Think about what you want to achieve: sympathy or respect or results and what sacrifices are you willing to make?

Does not require any effort: a smile, calling by name, pleasant words.

They require effort and pretense: the ability to listen, flatter, and be interested in the interlocutor.

Requires effort, but not pretense: the ability to be necessary, competent, sincere, decisive and sociable.

REMEMBER: IT IS IMPORTANT TO DO SOMETHING.

CONFLICTS AND CONFLICT SITUATIONS.

CONFLICT is the opposition of psychological attitudes and behavior, reaching the point of psychological inability of partners to continue joint activities. CONFLICT is a situation that includes opposing positions of the parties or opposing goals and means of resolving an existing problem, the implementation of which causes harm to the other.

That is, a conflict can have objective grounds (goals, interests, positions of the parties) and subjective grounds ( psychological incompatibility partners), According to some estimates, more than 65% of problems in organizations are related to disruption of relationships, and not to professional difficulties. 25% of managers' time is spent resolving conflicts.

Psychological compatibility, personal and group, is determined not so much by the absence of conflicts as by the ability of the individual and their group allow. Conflict is always a contradiction between expectations and reality. Consequently, the way out of the conflict is always either a restructuring of the situation or the attitude towards it. In this case, one must keep in mind the so-called Thomas theorem: “If a situation is defined by someone as real, then it is real in its consequences.” That is, if I think that I have a conflict with you, then I have a conflict with you, even if you don’t think so.

There are objective differences between people, people of a certain psychological type, psychological attitudes and situations that are more or less conducive to the development of conflicts.

Gender differences. Conflicts between men and women due to differences in cognitive, emotional reactions and behavioral, in particular business styles.

Age differences. There are special conflict periods of life: adolescence, youth, middle age. There is a generational conflict. “Fathers and Sons” Or modern gerontophobia in Russia - rejection of the elderly.

National and religious differences.

The solution is tolerance, understanding or ignoring the cause of the conflict.

Conflicts due to psychological incompatibility.

Conflict personalities.

Three “classes” of conflicting personalities can be distinguished: 1 - People whose conflict has positive consequences from the point of view of the interests of the business. These are active, assertive dominant personalities who do not recognize unshakable standards, rules and norms.

Extraordinary people, the “genius” type.

Structural destroyers

People with a critical mind.

2. People with socially disapproved personal qualities: troublemakers, gossips, curmudgeons, jealous people, envious people, liars, hypocrites, demagogues... Their behavior carries the danger of group disintegration or decline.

People with a conflicting behavior style, for example:

Rude is a tank. He screams, presses, demands his way. You need to move away. Decide in advance how far you will yield. Repeat his name. This will calm him down for a while. Then speak quickly and clearly. Plan a quick conversation.

“Screamer” – nervous. A person who starts yelling at the slightest trouble. Only sympathy. “Grenade” is an emotional explosion.

“Habitual Screamer” – He just always screams. Do not mention it.

"Know-it-all." Annoying with his self-confidence.

“Passive-aggressive” is someone who verbally agrees to work, but in reality sabotages...

“Over-accommodating” is someone who takes on an exorbitant amount of work and ends up doing nothing.

When dealing with conflicting personalities of type 1, it is necessary to develop maximum tolerance in yourself in the interests of the cause. At the same time, out of respect for the intelligence or talent of anyone, there is no need to abandon one’s own principles, rules of behavior and good manners, and ethical standards. When communicating with conflicting personalities of type 2, consistent and strict distancing is necessary. There is no need to be afraid to publicly tell a gossip or troublemaker that you are aware of the current state of affairs and are not going to tolerate their behavior.

CONFLICTS IN ORGANIZATIONS:

Organizational conflicts.

structural - between divisions,

innovative - at the time of reforms, conflicts of justice - due to the distribution of money or benefits, conflicts over resources,

RELATIONSHIP CONFLICTS

INTRAPERSONAL - a conflict between conflicting personal attitudes of an employee. For example, the conflict between personal and corporate ethics.

INTERPERSONAL - a conflict in relationships between specific people, conflicts between individual parts of a group or between a leader and a group or between a group and its member.

INTERGROUP - conflict between groups.

INTERDEPARTMENTAL - a conflict caused not by personal, but by departmental interests.

Conflicts can be targeted, when achieving victory makes the result absolute (election of a rector), and status (multifaceted and multi-subject).

Dynamic conflicts - situational conflicts, “out of nowhere.”

Constructive and destructive functions of conflicts.

Dynamics of conflict. Hidden conflict.

Pre-conflict stage. For a Conflict to begin to develop, an INCIDENT is necessary in which one of the parties commits actions that infringe on the interests of the other. An incident may occur at the initiative of one of the parties or independently of the wishes of both.

Critical stage of development.

Resolution of a conflict or withdrawal of one of the parties from it.

BUSINESS CONFLICT – interpersonal, intragroup, intergroup.

Subjects of communication are always looking for supporters, and therefore the conflict tends to grow. 70–80% of conflicts in organizations have a “vertical” component, that is, they are related to the activities of management.

Conflicting parties. The basis of the conflict. Source of conflict.

The conflict zone is the financial sector.

The cause of the conflict is

The style of behavior in a conflict is determined by the extent to which you intend to satisfy your own interests or the interests of the other party. There are different styles of COMPETITION, AVOIDANCE, ADAPTATION, COOPERATION, COMPROMISE. The basis for identifying these behavioral strategies is the dynamics of the relationship between the degree of persistence in satisfying one’s own interests and the willingness to meet others halfway in satisfying their interests.

Style of COMPETITION or RIVALRY (making a strong-willed decision and striving to defend it to the end).

if you have some power

or are absolutely sure that your decision is correct.

If a decision needs to be made quickly,

If you have to make a non-standard decision.

If you are confident in yourself, and if the outcome of the case is super important to you. Bet on victory. If you feel that you have no other choice and you have nothing to lose.

AVOIDANCE style – do not participate in someone else’s conflict, stop communicating if a conflict arises, refuse to immediately resolve the conflict.

Avoidance can be a constructive response to a conflict situation.

If you feel the need to reduce the intensity of passions.

If you want to gain time.

If the outcome of the case is not very important to you and you do not want to waste time and effort on it. If an attempt to resolve the conflict adds negative emotions to you.

If you know that you cannot resolve the conflict in your favor.

If you are afraid of making the situation worse.

ADAPTATION style – changing one’s position, restructuring one’s behavior, smoothing out contradictions to the detriment of one’s own interests. That is, the most important task is to restore calm, and not to resolve contradictions.

Acceptable

It is effective if the outcome of the case is more important for the opponent. You are not particularly interested in what happened. At this moment you want to maintain good relations with everyone.

If you cannot gain the upper hand due to having little power. You have little chance of winning.

If, if the conflict escalates, even more complex contradictions arise.

If you expect to strengthen your position as a result.

COOPERATION style – search for a mutually beneficial result.

It is effective if the parties have hidden motives, interests and needs and there are difficulties in identifying the source of the conflict.

If resolving the issue is important for both parties.

If you have a close, long-term and interdependent relationship.

If there is time to decide.

The COMPROMISE style involves partial satisfaction of the interests of both parties through mutual concessions. Compromise gives best result for the party with more power. It differs from cooperation in a more superficial level of conflict resolution, immediate problem solving, and preservation of the hidden causes of the conflict.

If the parties have equal power and have mutually exclusive interests.

If the parties want to find a solution quickly.

If you are satisfied with the temporary solution.

If you prefer to get at least something.

If nothing can be done.

Behavior in a conflict situation.

Methods for overcoming conflicts.

Step 1: Find time to talk.

Step 2: Discuss the problem.

Step 3. Make an agreement.

Let the interlocutor speak completely.

Reduce social and physical distance as much as possible

Divert attention from a painful issue, at least for a while.

Agree to share responsibility for the situation.

Rules for avoiding conflict situations.

Elimination from business communication of judgments and assessments, rude, ironic and malicious remarks that infringe on the self-esteem of the interlocutor. Respectful manner of speaking.

Listening skills. Refusal of the intention to immediately parry every remark of the interlocutor. Recognition that the interlocutor is right, especially if his judgments are aimed at maintaining his social status and prestige.

Eliminating biases.

The desire to discuss the problem, not positions.

When the costs of resolving the conflict exceed the benefits of interrupting it, you should end the relationship with your partner.

If you find that another person has a negative effect on you, think about how necessary it is for you to communicate with him.

If a person has more power than you. Use the following methods: 1. Determine what your opponent wants - to control the situation, achieve a specific goal, achieve your submission. 2. If his desires and interests are not clear to you, ask about them. 3. Let him feel the stability of his position, and then ask for his own.

If a person has less power than you, use the reward differentiation method.

Basic forms of conflict resolution.

Business conflicts (not business ones either) are resolved with the help of VIOLENCE, DISCONNECTION, RECONCILIATION of partners or WITH THE HELP OF A THIRD PARTY,

At the same time, we must proceed from the fact that the “WIN-WIN” business strategy is always effective; the “WIN (your) – LOSE (his)” strategy is effective only in an extreme situation; the “LOSS (yours) – WIN (his)” strategy is effective if you have a secret reason to lose; The “LOSE-LOSE” strategy is always ineffective.

VIOLENCE. Strategically it is not very effective, since in any case it worsens the relationship. Always means mutual loss. Involves the “complete destruction of the enemy.”

DISCONNECTION. Effective if possible in territorial terms (space or time). May occur as a result of the “escape” of one of the parties to the conflict. It is effective if it leads to the resolution of the conflict.

RECONCILIATION. Perhaps as a result of a showdown; as a result of negotiations; "by itself".

WITH THE HELP OF A THIRD PARTY. The “third party” can choose to SUPPORT one of the parties to the conflict or take an INDEPENDENT POSITION.

If one of the parties is supported, the THIRD resorts to violence in the form of PUNISHMENT. SOCIAL PRESSURE. APPEAL TO THE MEDIA.

In the case of an independent position, the THIRD can be a JUDGE (punish both); ARBITRATOR (follow the argumentation and duel of both) or MEDIATOR (try to extinguish the conflict).

In any case, you should remember:

The place of work is the only connection between an individual and society. The development of this connection depends on the organizational climate, management activities, and individual behavioral style.

Compatibility.

Successful communication.

Criteria: achieving and maintaining contact; satisfaction with communication, absence of difficulties (tension, fear, suspicion. Signs: ease and spontaneity, adaptability and compatibility.

Contact as a natural gift and as a result of volitional efforts.

Over-contact or obsessive contact is a specific psychological type.

High contact

Highly compatible: non-conflict, non-aggressive, non-authoritarian, hyper-adaptive, without personal problems.

Culture (lat. cultura cultivation, upbringing, education, development, veneration) is a specific way of organizing and developing human life, represented in the products of material and spiritual labor, in the system of social norms and institutions, in spiritual values, in the totality of people’s relationships to nature, among themselves and to themselves. Culture can record the way of life of an individual (personal culture), a social group (for example, class culture) or society as a whole. Culture also characterizes the characteristics of consciousness, behavior and

the activities of people in specific areas of public life (management culture, work culture, communication culture, etc.). Thus, from the above it follows that adherence to the culture of business communication contributes to the effective achievement of goals in the process of business contacts.

To consider the issue, let us highlight some individual character traits that create a person’s predisposition to conflictual relationships with other people. More often than others, conflicted people are people with inadequately high or low self-esteem. It is equally bad if a person overestimates or underestimates himself and his capabilities. In both cases, individual self-esteem may conflict with the assessment of others.

A certain set of negative emotional personality traits (anxiety, aggressiveness, stubbornness, irritability, etc.) and negative intellectual qualities, such as rigidity (lack of flexibility) and inertia (inability to perceive new things) are a breeding ground for the formation of conflictual relationships. The listed personality qualities in different combinations and quantities may be inherent in a particular person. However, the presence of these qualities does not mean that they will inevitably lead to conflictual relationships.

In order for such relationships to arise, interpersonal incompatibility must arise - a discrepancy between the individual psychological characteristics of one person and the individual psychological characteristics of another. This means that two people share certain personality traits,

among which there are difficultly compatible or incompatible under certain objective conditions. The basis for interpersonal incompatibility may be differences in individual interests or in ideas about the interests of colleagues.

As an example, consider the types of temperament (choleric, sanguine, phlegmatic, melancholic). In a normal, calm environment, choleric and phlegmatic people successfully cope with the tasks assigned to them. In acute emergency situations, the slowness of a phlegmatic person and the hot temper and imbalance of a choleric person can cause conflict relations between them.

The socio-psychological causes of conflict relationships are determined by the peculiarities of people’s intra-group life. They underlie socio-psychological incompatibility. To understand them, let us consider the definitions of “intra-role conflict” and

"inter-role conflict".

Intra-role conflicts arise when there are contradictory ideas about the totality of rights and responsibilities of people performing the same role, i.e. surrounding people make difficult or practically incompatible demands on the individual.

Inter-role conflicts arise in situations when a person is forced to simultaneously perform roles that place incompatible or difficult-to-compatible demands on him (for example, a turner is transferred to the position of foreman).

The basis of socio-psychological incompatibility may be the discrepancy between ideas about group norms of behavior and those towards which a given person is oriented. This situation occurs in people who are psychologically

are focused on the norms of behavior of their reference group, and not the one in which they work.

In addition to socio-psychological relations, the causes of conflict can be: material-technical, economic-political, economic-organizational, social-professional, socio-demographic, etc.

In practice, a distinction is made between potential and real conflict. The difference between them is that in the event of a real conflict, its participants, having realized the relationship that has developed between them, move on to conflict behavior. The strategy for this behavior can be different. However, all the variety of forms of conflict behavior can be reduced to three main strategies:

– leaving the system of relationships with the person with whom a conflict may occur;

– lengthy negotiations with clarification of many details of the existing relationship and the willingness of both parties to make mutual concessions, i.e. compromise;

– struggle with an attempt to defend one’s positions, which may turn out to be both correct and erroneous.

The strategy of conflict behavior can be chosen both unconsciously and consciously. Regardless of the behavior strategy chosen by the participants in the conflict, any conflict ends or is resolved

a certain outcome. The conflict can completely

to fade away - this is its true outcome. This means that the conflict is eliminated not only at the behavioral level, but also at the internal level, when former participants in conflicting relationships no longer perceive each other as opponents.

Any conflict can play a dual role, combining constructive and deconstructive functions.

The deconstructive function is that damage is caused to the health of participants in conflicts, and this manifests itself primarily in neuroses. In the most unfavorable relationships, the cost of conflict can be very high - heart attack, stroke and even death. Considerable damage is also caused to production (loss of working time, decrease in productive labor, etc.).

Qualities that must be taken into account in achieving harmony in relationships with other people, according to E.Ya. Melibrudes are as follows:

1. Empathy. The ability to see the world through the eyes of others, to understand it in the same way as they perceive their actions from their own positions and at the same time have the ability to tell others about their understanding and give the opportunity to confirm or refute these ideas.

2. Goodwill. The ability not only to feel, but also to show people your friendly attitude, respect and sympathy, the ability to accept them even when you do not approve of their actions, the willingness to support others.

3. Authenticity. The ability to be natural in relationships, not to hide behind masks or roles, openly demonstrating to others your attitude towards different problems and people, the ability to be yourself in contacts with others.

4. Specificity. Refusal of general reasoning, ambiguous and vague remarks, the ability to talk about one’s specific experiences, opinions, actions, readiness to answer all questions unambiguously.

5. Initiative. A tendency to take an active position in relationships with people, to “go ahead” and not just react to what others are doing, the ability to establish contacts without waiting for initiative from the outside, the willingness to take on some things in situations that require actively intervene rather than simply wait for others to do something.

6. Spontaneity. The ability to speak and act directly, a clear understanding of the attitude of other people and a clear demonstration of one’s attitude towards them.

7. Openness. Willingness to open your inner world to others, a firm belief that openness contributes to the establishment of healthy and strong relationships with others, the ability to talk about your thoughts and feelings.

8. Acceptance of feelings. The absence of fear in direct contact with one’s own feelings or the feelings of other people, the ability not only to experience some feelings in communication with other people, but also to show them, to express readiness to accept emotional expression from others. However, there should be no desire to impose your feelings on others, so that they realize their responsibility for them.

9. Confrontation. The ability to “face to face” deal with other people with full awareness of one’s responsibility and interest; in case of divergence of opinions - a willingness to confront, but not with the goal of scaring or punishing the other, but with the hope of establishing genuine and sincere relationships.

10. Self-knowledge. A cognitive attitude towards one’s own life and behavior, the desire to take advantage of outside help for this

others, the willingness to accept any information from them about how they perceive you. However, it is necessary to be the author of your self-esteem; evaluate relationships with other people and new experiences as central material important for deeper self-knowledge.

For practical purposes it will be useful information that each psychometric personality form prefers different styles of behavior in conflict situations from the identified five classical styles (Table 6).

Table 6

Classic styles of behavior in conflict situations

Psychological incompatibility and compatibility are very interesting concepts, because each of us knows that it is easy and pleasant to communicate with some people, but almost unbearable with others. In this context, it is very important to understand what psychological compatibility is.

Same and different

Each person is an individual person with a certain set of character traits, habits, values, attitudes, etc. Depending on this, he selects his social circle and can easily or difficultly get along with other people.

By the way, the ability to understand a partner is influenced by various factors: age, social status, education, cultural level, etc. If all this is too different between people, then they can often have disagreements, and vice versa, if people have a lot in common, then we can talk about socio-psychological compatibility. This is a very multifaceted concept, one might even say multi-level.

In relationships between people, in terms of psychological compatibility, temperaments play a big influence. Imagine a sociable, quick in his thoughts and actions, explosive choleric person. For example, it is very difficult for him to communicate with phlegmatic people who are focused on their own thoughts, are somewhat withdrawn and cannot easily switch from one thing to another.

But not everything depends only on temperament or character. The level of cultural and personal development is very important. Psychological compatibility of people is possible when they have common ideas about life and agree on expectations from each other.

Team

It's no secret that we spend most of our adult adult life at work, so psychological compatibility in a team is very important. If a person feels that he is comfortable and calm at work, then everything in his life is going well.

Therefore, it is not surprising that many people prefer a good work environment with lower earnings to high earnings and a bad team. For them, a good emotional environment, a positive mood, mutual assistance and understanding are more important than career growth and money.

In order for the team to function most optimally, psychologists advise managers, directors and other senior employees when selecting personnel to take into account not only the level of education, professional knowledge, skills and abilities, but also what kind of mutual understanding they have, how they interact with each other, etc. .e. Is there psychological compatibility and workability between them?

It is noteworthy that in any team, be it a school, an institute or some kind of organization (for example, a factory), the concept of psychological compatibility depends specifically on each of its members. If they can all work productively together and at the same time feel comfortable, calm and emotionally satisfied, then this will have a good effect on each of them individually, and on the group as a whole and on labor productivity. Moreover, psychology determines that in a team, emotional comfort is all the more important the longer this very team exists.

By the way, the number of employees will also affect the mood: for a large organization the problem of psychological compatibility is not as acute as for a team of up to 10 people. It is very important for a small group to feel well emotionally. For such a team, professional skills are not so important, because they can be learned in the course of life, but character, temperament, habits and values ​​are almost impossible to change.

Incompatibility

As already noted, there is the concept of psychological incompatibility. It can be discussed in the light of both friendships, family and work relationships. In the latter case, the psychological compatibility of group members is reduced to zero.

Members of the team do not treat each other as comrades and friends, they do not respect each other, and sometimes they simply hate each other and try to put a spoke in each other’s wheels. In such conditions, people not only experience a lot of negative emotions, but ultimately this has an extremely negative impact on their productivity and the activities of the company as a whole.

Psychologists identify several main types of psychological incompatibility:

• Psychophysiological – intolerance to the physical characteristics of another person. For example, one may be annoyed by another loudly stirring sugar with a spoon in a glass, while another may hate the smell of the other’s cologne.
• Socio-psychological – occurs when roles are unfairly distributed in a team. For example, the head of a department is a person who does not correspond to the position held and does not have the appropriate level of knowledge.
• Ideological – when beliefs, values ​​and worldviews do not coincide. For example, one person is a racist, but those around him do not understand; one or more members of the team are avid communists, while others are representatives of the democratic party. In this case, ideology can influence relationships and even work productivity.

All of the above interferes with the interaction of team members. And by and large, the incompatibility of worldviews sometimes leads to civil wars and revolutions.

Family life

IN family life Compatibility is also extremely important. It can be described by two characteristics - psychological and physiological. In the first case, we are talking about how emotionally satisfied a person is with his partner, and in the second - mostly intimate intimacy is meant - about the harmony of caresses and mutual satisfaction from intimacy. It is worth noting that normal married life is impossible without spiritual and everyday compatibility.

The psychological compatibility of spouses in some ways can be identified with marital satisfaction. If one of the family members or both spouses are unhappy with the way they are living in the marriage, sooner or later this will most likely lead to divorce.

Let us note that optimal relationships in marriage develop between those spouses whose roles are correctly distributed and no conflicts arise. By the way, if we talk about temperaments, psychologists consider the most successful union between (husband) and (wife). Their compatibility in marriage is considered the best.

If the marriage was concluded between a sanguine person, then there is no need to talk about the duration and strength of such a union. Both of them are strong personalities, are little willing to make concessions, and often compete for power and leadership in the family. It turns out that one of them will definitely win, and the second will have to put up with his opinion. Ultimately, this does not lead to anything good.

In a couple between a melancholic person, satisfaction with the relationship is usually low; the union between a melancholic person and a choleric person can also be called not very good. Psychologists tend to consider relationships between partners of the same temperament type to be complex; even children cannot cement such unions - and they cannot help parents in resolving interpersonal issues.

To summarize, let's say that psychological compatibility is possible when people have approximately the same values, interests, goals, lifestyle, cultural development, education, etc. However, in real life this does not always happen, and in order for life to be more harmonious, we have to be more tolerant of each other. Author: Elena Ragozina

Usually, after several years of active planning, searching for the reasons for the failure of the desired pregnancy, a married couple decides to consult a geneticist. In our country, genetic consultation, unfortunately, is not as popular as in Europe and North America. But every year the percentage of couples who include a partner compatibility test in the initial stage of preparation for pregnancy is increasing.

Incompatibility of partners

There are several types of incompatibility:

• immunological;
• incompatibility of partners by Rh factor;
• genetic;
• psychological.

Immunological incompatibility of spouses

This type incompatibility is a negative reaction of a woman’s body to her partner’s sperm. That is, the woman’s immune system, perceiving sperm as foreign and dangerous to the body, begins to produce “antibodies” that prevent sperm from fertilizing the egg.

In addition, antibodies in large quantities can occur not only in the female body. The sperm of a healthy man may also contain antibodies that destroy sperm, and if some do manage to survive and reach the egg, there is a risk of a problematic pregnancy or a miscarriage.

Therefore, both spouses are sent for examination. A man must pass a spermogram and a MAR test. A spermogram is a sperm test to determine the number of sperm, their motility, quality, viscosity and sperm liquefaction time. This analysis also shows the presence of viral diseases. The MAR test is aimed at identifying antibodies in the seminal fluid that prevent the fertilization of the egg. According to WHO recommendations, the MAR test is best taken in conjunction with a spermogram. In order for the result to be accurate, it is necessary to take tests only in reproductive medicine clinics, that is, in clinics specializing in IVF. For analysis, a man must comply with certain requirements, namely, for 4-6 days before donating seminal fluid for examination, he must abstain from nicotine, taking alcoholic beverages and medications, from sexual activity, hot baths and saunas. The latest requirements are due to the fact that high temperatures negatively affect sperm.

Determination of immunological incompatibility

To confirm a woman’s “allergic” reaction to her partner’s ejaculate, the following tests are available:

• Shuvarsky-Sims-Guner test;
• Kurzrock-Miller test.

All tests are carried out during the ovulatory period. It is imperative to avoid taking medications at this time.

Sample "Shuvarsky-Sims-Guner" or a postcoital test is performed on the day of expected ovulation and 4-5 hours after intercourse. The analysis is taken by collecting mucus from the posterior vaginal vault and the cervical canal, after which the behavior of sperm is examined under a microscope. If sperm make oscillatory movements instead of forward movements, this means that antisperm antibodies are present in the cervical mucus. Next, a quantitative assessment is carried out. If there are more than 10 motile sperm, the test is positive. If less than 10, the result is considered doubtful and requires repetition. If there are no motile sperm at all or they make pendulum-like movements, the test is negative.

Kurzrock-Miller test very similar to the postcoital test, but the test material is taken directly from both partners. In addition, the couple must abstain from “personal life” for several days before taking the test, and stop taking alcohol and medications.

There are two ways to conduct the test - direct and crossover.

The direct method is a study of the interaction of cervical mucus and sperm, which are combined in a test tube. The crossover method uses biomaterial from donors who have children.

On the day of ovulation, mucus is taken from the cervix for analysis. It fits between two glasses. Next, they take the biomaterial of the spouse and the donor and place it in the resulting gaps. For six hours at a temperature of 37°C, the mucus interacts with the sperm. The qualitative indicators of the husband's ejaculate are checked in the same way using the cervical fluid of the wife and the donor woman.

If, when interacting with the biomaterial, at least half of the sperm do not die and remain active, the test result is considered positive.

Unfortunately, immunological infertility is currently poorly understood. For gynecologists, andrologists and doctors associated with the reproductive system, the emergence of antibodies that interfere with successful fertilization still remains a mystery. Treatment for a married couple does not always help achieve the desired goal - pregnancy and birth. healthy child. But there is still a treatment.

Treatment methods for immunological incompatibility

• The first method is aimed at reducing the sensitivity of the female body to sperm. Condoms must be used for several months.
• The second method is taking antihistamines.
• The third method is to prescribe various doses of corticosteroids in the week before ovulation.
• The fourth method is the procedure of artificial insemination, IVF or ICSI. Artificial insemination is a relatively simple, safe and cheap alternative to expensive IVF and ICSI methods.

The procedure must be carried out on the eve of ovulation. The spouse's sperm is injected into the uterine cavity using a catheter. Artificial insemination allows you to exclude the cervical canal, where, due to immunological incompatibility, mucus is formed, which has a detrimental effect on sperm, and thereby increases the chances of success.

There are two types of artificial insemination. The first is performed using the spouse's raw sperm. This method has a low result and carries the risk of an allergic reaction.

The second method is the introduction of treated sperm into the uterine cavity. Fresh sperm is placed in a special centrifuge in which the sperm are separated. After this, they are placed in saline solution. This manipulation is repeated three times. It is this processed mixture that is injected into the uterus. This method is safer and more effective. On average, after artificial insemination, pregnancy occurs in 10-12% of couples. This procedure can be repeated no more than 3-4 times, since after the third time the chance of getting pregnant drops sharply.

IVF or in vitro fertilization is one of the methods of treating infertility. The essence of the technique is that the egg is fertilized and develops outside the body of the expectant mother. On days 2 - 5 after fertilization, the embryo is transferred to the uterus, which further develops as during natural fertilization. Usually at least two embryos are transferred to increase the chances of a positive result. After embryo transfer, two weeks later, the woman donates blood for hCG to confirm pregnancy or its absence.

The main complication after IVF is ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome due to the use of stimulants for ovulation.

The ICSI method is very similar to IVF and is usually carried out as part of it. This technique is prescribed when the spouse’s sperm is of low quality. The most active, high-quality and viable sperm is selected from the ejaculate sample, which is injected directly into the mature egg using a special needle. The procedure takes place under the full supervision of a specialist and, unlike in vitro fertilization no longer so close to natural conception.

Incompatibility of spouses based on Rh factor

This is a reaction of a woman’s immune system to a fetus that has a different Rh factor and blood type from hers. This type of incompatibility is not significant. Since usually, with any combination of blood groups and Rh factors, pregnancy can occur.

Rh factor is an antigen (protein) found on the surface of red blood cells. Red blood cells are red blood cells. If this antigen is present in the blood, then the person has a positive Rh factor. If it is absent, then the person is Rhesus negative.

Women with a negative Rh factor are at risk, since the positive Rh factor of the father, as a dominant trait, is passed on to the child. Fetal red blood cells easily pass through the placenta into the maternal blood, in turn, the woman’s immune system begins to produce antibodies to fight the red blood cells of the embryo. The result of incompatibility may be a miscarriage early, death of the fetus at a later stage or the appearance of hemolytic disease in the child.

Woman with Rh negative When planning a pregnancy, you should definitely check the level of antibodies in your blood to the Rh factor. Starting from the 7th week of pregnancy, strict control over the level of antibodies is necessary. Anti-Rhesus immunoglobulin must be administered within 72 hours after birth.

Genetic incompatibility

Genetic incompatibility of spouses is a conflict at the chromosomal level.

Every person's body contains HLA genes or tissue antigens. They are divided into two classes. Genetic incompatibility is the similarity of class II HLA genes between spouses.

HLA II or leukocyte antigen is a protein that is present on the surface of every human cell.

Protein function:

• detection of a virus that promotes cell mutation;
• recognition of bacteria with their own genotype;
• detection of structural changes in one's own cell.

Almost every day, some cells in our body undergo mutations, but if destroyed in time, they are not dangerous. Otherwise, cell mutation threatens cancer.

The child's HLA genes consist of the father's HLA genes and the mother's HLA genes. Most often, these genes are not similar to each other. In this case, when the embryo is implanted into the walls of the uterus, the mother’s body perceives the child as a half “alien” formation and begins to produce antibodies to the father’s HLA II genes. These specific antibodies are aimed at protecting and preserving the embryo. That is, thanks to them, the female immune system stops viewing the fetus as a change in its own cells, and pregnancy continues to develop safely.

If the HLAs of the spouses are similar, the female body does not perceive the “paternal” component in small quantities. The immune system sees the mother's mutated (oncological) cells in the fetus and begins to fight them. As a result, even before the onset of the first trimester, either a miscarriage or a frozen pregnancy occurs.

Signs and identification of genetic incompatibility of spouses

The diagnosis of “genetic incompatibility” is very rare in spouses who are not related. If the pregnancy is interrupted or a frozen pregnancy occurs, and the attending physician has not identified any infectious, immunological or other causes of the miscarriage, the couple should undergo a genetic consultation.

When testing for compatibility, blood is taken from a vein from a couple. Pure DNA is isolated from the venous blood of each spouse, which is subjected to in-depth analysis, after which it undergoes a comparative study. The analysis takes approximately two weeks.

Complete incompatibility is diagnosed extremely rarely, and, unfortunately, nothing can be done about it. Most often, partial incompatibility is recorded. Under the supervision of an experienced geneticist, there are ways to regulate it at all three stages: from planning to pregnancy.

One treatment option is medication. Depending on the individual situation of the couple, the spouses are sent for IVF or ICSI.

Psychological incompatibility of spouses

When planning a pregnancy, a very important aspect is the “climate” in the family. Everyone knows that our emotional condition affects the functioning of our body.

Dissonance between spouses can be caused by many factors. For example, material wealth, nationality and religion, relationships with relatives, social status and, of course, the physiological aspect have a great influence on the relationship between spouses and the emotional state of each of them. The inability of a couple to hear each other, understand the problem and solve it leads to the accumulation of grievances, negativity, and disappointment in their “other half.” But it is the emotional state, especially during pregnancy planning, that affects the functioning of the body.

A negative attitude towards one’s partner, towards everyday problems, towards material well-being, towards a woman’s desire to combine a career with motherhood and the negative attitude of the spouse and relatives towards this desire, all this can be the cause of infertility in the future. psychological level. Scientists have proven that often “strained” relationships in a couple are one of the reasons for the appearance of “anti-sperm” antibodies in both the female and male body. In addition, the psychological factor can influence female hormonal levels, and even poor patency of the tubes.

The main step to overcoming psychological incompatibility is recognition of it by the spouses and the desire to overcome it. Every time a problem arises, try to put yourself in your partner’s shoes. Think about whether it’s worth it to be offended and start quarrels over little things. Women are advised to tell a man directly what they expect from him. Men don't take hints. They need to set clear goals. Men should also remember that his wife, just because she belongs to the “fairer sex,” is not obliged to carry out all the housework. Distribute responsibilities, she cooks - he washes the dishes, she does the wet cleaning - he vacuums. Don't have sex just to conceive a child, relax and have fun. Talk more and spend time together.

Let's sum it up

The birth of a new life is a complex and still quite mysterious process. Yes, modern methods of treating incompatibility between spouses are not always effective, but medicine does not stand still, and every day the secret of human birth is gradually revealed to us. In addition, there are many examples when a couple with a disappointing diagnosis of infertility miraculously has a child without treatment or drug interventions.

If you are still unable to get pregnant, under no circumstances should you despair or become obsessed with it. Very often, spouses, in a fit of anger caused by hopelessness, begin to blame each other for failures. Stop, calm down and think that your loved one is next to you. You must support each other. And then everything will work out for you.

Video - Rhesus conflict during pregnancy

Department of Social and Humanitarian Disciplines
ABSTRACT
IN CONFLICTOLOGY

Topic: Psychological incompatibility as a cause of conflict in a team

Performer: cadet 307 academic group.
3 FPS KM and MOB

Drozdetsky I.A.

Ekaterinburg, 2010

Content
Introduction………………………………………………………………………..3

The essence and features of psychological incompatibility…………5
Temperament as an indicator of psychological compatibility..……15
Difficulties in communication as a factor of human incompatibility..……21

Introduction
For a long time, philosophers have tried to identify the patterns of certain forms of personal behavior, to determine why it is easy to find a common language with one person, but there is no way to find a common language with another, what determines the logic of an individual’s behavior.
Indeed, this problem is very relevant today. Especially in the world of work. There are often cases when employees prefer a good team not only to greater monetary reward for their work, but also to career prospects. For many, peace of mind at work and positive emotional contacts with colleagues are more important.
The problem of psychological compatibility of workers began to be studied in Russia during the USSR, and in other countries also relatively recently. The influence of this factor on the psychological climate of the team can now be considered proven. After all, it often happens that in outwardly identical conditions, at the same enterprise, teams are formed that differ significantly from one another in their psychological climate.
For me, the relevance of the chosen topic is due to the fact that at this stage of life I have to join new teams, work myself and organize work in a team.
The object of the study is the psychological incompatibility of personalities. The subject of the study is the influence of psychological incompatibility of people on the team.
The purpose of the essay is to identify and study the characteristics of psychological incompatibility of team members.
Based on the goal, the following work tasks are highlighted:
- study the essence of the phenomenon of psychological incompatibility and its role in the socio-psychological climate of the team
- consider the features of the main indicator of psychological compatibility – temperament
- consider the types of difficulties in communication and joint activities of people under the influence of psychological incompatibility
The methodological basis of the research consists of methods of systemic-situational analysis, synthesis, and structural-logical method.
The literature used in the work covers different time periods for studying the questions posed. The work also uses two monographs and Internet resources.

The essence and features of psychological incompatibility

2. Temperament as an indicator of psychological compatibility.
The psychological compatibility of team members is a combination of individual qualities of group members that ensure the coherence and effectiveness of their activities.
Compatibility includes a number of qualities:
- physiological (gender, age and other physiological characteristics);
- psychophysiological (differences in temperaments and biological needs);
- actually psychological (personal character and motives of behavior)
- socio-psychological (values, interests, role expectations).
It has been proven that psychological compatibility has a positive effect on labor productivity and product quality.
One of the starting points for ensuring psychological compatibility is taking into account the temperamental characteristics of group members. 9
Temperament is a system of emotional and dynamic (characterizing the speed of psychological reactions and activity) personality properties.
In modern psychology, a basic typology of temperaments is widespread, which includes 4 types: sanguine, melancholic, choleric and phlegmatic. A fairly clear graphical scheme for classifying these temperaments was proposed by a group of American scientists led by G. Eysenck.
This scheme allows you to classify different temperaments of people depending on two groups of indicators: introversion - extraversion (horizontal axis) and emotional stability - neuroticism (vertical axis).
Extraversion means a person’s psychological orientation towards the outside world, others, communication with other people, openness and activity; introversion is the exact opposite type, which involves directing the individual’s attention to his own world and interests, increased reflexivity, focus on internal experiences and external passivity and isolation.
Emotional stability means the stability of the nervous system, manifested in calmness, high immunity to stress, etc.; Neuroticism is the exact opposite quality.
Knowing and taking into account the characteristics of temperament is an important condition for ensuring group compatibility and efficiency, as well as optimal distribution of tasks.
In a group, the negative traits of one temperament can be balanced by the positive traits of another, for example, the pessimism and isolation of a melancholic person - with the optimism and sociability of a sanguine person.
The ease of mood changes and increases in the choleric person is well complemented by the calmness, logic and steady determination of the phlegmatic person.
However, not all types of temperaments can be mutually complementary. The most complex, negative types usually include non-syntonic introverts - internally oriented people with a rigid antisocial attitude. 10
On the basis of personal temperaments, various character traits are identified as stable psychological qualities that determine the employee’s attitude to the job, to himself, to other people, etc. Character traits can be very different: seriousness - frivolity, integrity - unprincipledness, collectivism - individualism. Taking into account and optimal combination of various personal characteristics is an important factor in group compatibility and effectiveness.
The natural properties of an individual are what are inherent in him from birth and, as a rule, are characterized by one or another degree of expression of such dynamic characteristics as activity and emotionality.
The activity of an individual is expressed in the desire for various types of activities, manifestation of oneself, strength and speed of mental processes, motor reactions, etc. Acts as a property of an individual’s activity.
The extreme expression of activity is, on the one hand, great energy, swiftness in movement, activity, speech, and on the other hand, lethargy, passivity of mental processes, speech.
Emotionality manifests itself in varying degrees of nervous excitability of an individual, the dynamics of his emotions and feelings that characterize his attitude towards the world around him. eleven
etc.................