What to do if you are beaten. “My parents beat me”: Three victims of domestic violence talk about beatings, humiliation and fear. Is it possible to withdraw a statement about beatings?

Conflict situations at any time often result in assault. Someone suffers because of their own ignorance, and someone suffers because of an absurd accident; for this it is enough to meet several hooligans on the street, who in any case will find a reason for conflict. Any person, finding himself in such a situation, without the slightest exaggeration, stressful situation, will definitely get confused. However, the procedure is strictly regulated by law, and if you are beaten up, what to do - the lawyers of our portal will definitely tell you after analyzing the circumstances of a particular situation.

Below are general recommendations regarding the location of the beating, motives and other individual circumstances of the conflict. First of all, let's try to understand the rules of law that were violated, what to do if you are beaten in such a situation it often depends on the qualification of the offense.

What legal norms can be violated in a situation where you are beaten?

Inflicting beatings on a person, which did or did not result in harm to his health of any severity, but caused physical suffering, is a violation of criminal law. For a more precise understanding of what to do if you are beaten on the street, it is important to know the difference between private and public criminal cases.

In cases provided for by procedural legislation (the law specifies specific articles of the Criminal Code), due to the low social danger of the offense, a case can be initiated only upon the application of the victim. This procedure is called private prosecution and is observed in a number of cases when the offense involves the use of physical force.

The law includes the following crimes:

Beatings (not for hooligan reasons or racial or other similar prejudices), which had no consequences for the health of the victim, but caused him physical suffering;
The same actions with the same motives, but as a result of which the victim’s health is slightly harmed.

In other cases, including:

Causing harm to the health of a victim of moderate or severe severity intentionally;
Death threat;
Hooliganism and other similar offenses,

the state assumes full responsibility for initiating criminal prosecution and punishing the offender.

It should be noted that the private procedure also implies the possibility of complete termination of the case in the event of reconciliation of the parties. In cases of public and third-level prosecution - private-public - this possibility is not provided.

If you were beaten, what to do: recording the damage

The first step after a beating of any severity should be to go to the hospital, emergency room on your own or by calling an ambulance. This is necessary not only to exclude possible consequences for health, but also to record “hot on the heels” of inflicted injuries.

An additional “bonus” of seeking official medical help will be the mandatory reporting of the fact of violent acts to the police. Medical workers must make an entry in a special journal about all those who seek help as a result of injuries allegedly received by violence, and the message is transmitted to law enforcement agencies via telephone message.

In the future, if a case is filed, the victim will once again have to confirm the presence of injuries through a forensic medical examination.

The next action for a person asking the question - if I was beaten, what should I do? - will be a direct appeal to law enforcement agencies, namely the police.

The main document for starting a criminal prosecution should be a statement from the victim. You can submit it in several ways:

When visiting the precinct in person. The application is submitted to the duty station, the fact of acceptance is confirmed by the issuance of a notification coupon;
Via postal service. It is better to send the letter by registered mail with acknowledgment of receipt; this, if necessary, will record the fact that the application was accepted by the police;
The application can also be sent by mail to the prosecutor's office, from where it will be forwarded to the police for verification.

The statement itself must contain a clear description of all the circumstances of the case (who, when, where, what kind of beatings he inflicted, for what reasons, etc.). In addition, it is important to definitely formulate your request - to carry out an inspection and initiate a criminal case.

Copies of medical documents confirming the fact of bodily injury must be attached to the application.

After the inspection, the police will make one of the following decisions, which will be formalized in the form of a resolution and sent to all interested parties:

Initiate a criminal case and begin an investigation;
Refuse to initiate a criminal case for lack of corpus delicti;
Refuse to initiate a criminal case and explain to the citizen his right to appeal to the magistrate’s court privately.

In the first case, the case will be under police control, and the victim will certainly be notified of further events. In the second, in case of disagreement with the resolution, you can contact the prosecutor’s office with a request to verify its legality. In the third - a victim wondering - If I was beaten, what should I do? – must apply to the Magistrates' Court.

Not only the victim can go to court - in cases where he is unable to do this for objective reasons, the application must be submitted by the investigator or inquiry officer. In the event of the death of the victim, this can be done by his legal representative.

The application is subject to clear content requirements (the full list is defined in Article 318 of the Code of Criminal Procedure), including information about the offender and a list of witnesses. If the requirements for the document are not met, the court may return it without consideration for revision.

The court, at the request of the parties, may assist them in collecting evidence. Consideration of this type of cases is carried out according to general rules criminal proceedings.

It is important to make every effort to preserve the situation at the scene until it is examined by the police;
Any information is important to establish the identity of the offender - try to remember it and reproduce it for the police;
Show medical professionals all injuries, even minor ones, in your opinion;
For forensic medical experts, save the lists medicines and the procedures you used after the injury;
Keep all documents confirming the cost of treatment;
You have the right to request copies of all police reports. Carefully monitor the correct display of the facts recorded in them;
Sign only documents that you understand.

In conclusion, we note that being injured by force almost always entails not only physical health problems, but also a lot of stress. In such a state, it is better to entrust action planning to professionals. You can get free information on all issues related to initiating criminal prosecution due to beating on our portal.

Often on the street, in a bar or any other place, you can encounter someone trying to provoke a conflict. How to talk to gopniks, hooligans and just drunk assholes? Is it worth fighting in any conflict, for an insult or a challenge? How to get out of such situations?

A punk insulted you on the street, hurt your companion, or found fault with your appearance? Find yourself in a difficult situation and don’t know how to behave? Is it worth fighting immediately in any conflict or is it better to try to avoid the conflict? What to do with pride, insults and similar antics from scumbags?

Is it worth fighting in any conflict?

Stay confident at the start of a conflict

Are you thinking about fighting or not? Don't rush to rush into a crowd of enemies. It is not at all clear how the conflict will end. The enemy may be a professional fighter, he may have a weapon in his pocket or friends nearby. Often, after a fight, its participants go to jail, are injured, or are sent to a cemetery. The best fight is the one that doesn't happen.

Keep your inner calm. Demonstrate confident behavior rather than fear, fear, fuss or anxiety. Let the enemy feel that he is dealing with a strong opponent who is not afraid of conflict: “What, those?”, “What do you want?”, “Did someone ask you?”, “Who are you?”, “Easy”, “Do we need this?” The enemy must understand that he will not escape unscathed either.

How to talk to a gopnik, punks or thugs

If you are recommended to come closer or have complaints about your appearance, then you should not be led by the gopniks. As soon as you obediently approach them or start making excuses for the color of your sneakers, everything is gone. They are boys, and you are a sucker. There are universal answers to the claims of punks and gopniks. The main thing is not to bend and not to give in to provocations.

Gopnik shouts: “Hey, come here”, “Hey, stop”
You can just stop and say: “What?”, “What?”, “You need it, you come”
Gopnik extends his hand.
Don’t shake back, but ask: “Who are you?”
Gopnik runs over: “Where are you from?”, “Do you have any money?”, “Give me your phone!”, “Who are you in life?”
Response to complaints: “I don’t know you,” “For what purpose are you interested?”

In a conversation, hold your position, don’t explain anything, don’t make concessions, don’t apologize, don’t bend. Do not give the opportunity to provoke and gain the moral right to attack, rob, humiliate. Be polite but firm. The purpose of your conversation is that he himself must explain what he needs. In 90% of cases, just remain silent and answer in monosyllables. For you, a draw is a victory. Let Gopnik finish the dialogue first.

How to fight in conflict

Is it worth fighting in any conflict? Try to avoid it, but act confident. If a fight is unavoidable, hit. In case of great danger and a crowd of attackers, run, scream, call the police, break a window or set the car alarm to go off.

Often a normal conversation can come to naught and there will be no reason for a fight. This the best option. But when talking, be ready to start a fight at any moment. Watch right hand the enemy, the space around you and the actions of his friends.

If you see that a fight cannot be avoided, then strike first. Don’t wait, depending on what effect your first blow had on him. Hit him while he's on his feet. If the crowd is against you, then do not hesitate to use a stick, brick or other objects to fight.

Often, even the presence of a spray can, knife or pistol may not stop the attackers. But don't be afraid to use them. It is better to go to jail for exceeding self-defense than to go to heaven or become crippled for life.

Even if, most likely, you win the fight, you should not tempt fate. Hit a couple of times and run. Don't wait for his friends to appear, for a knife to appear in his pocket, or for a police patrol. Run away as quickly as possible.

Jason Statham in the movie "The Hummingbird Effect" in a fight with hooligans

According to UNICEF, 67% of Kazakh parents use violence in raising their children, and 75% support corporal punishment. We spoke to three heroes who have experienced domestic physical violence over the years.

Valentina, 22 years old:

I always loved my father more, he never beat me. The main aggressor was always the mother.

I remember all the cases, but one in particular. I was about 11 or 12 years old. I came home from school and immediately went to the shower; my mother was in a terrible mood that day. I knew that she would beat me because I got a C in math and stood in the shower for a very long time. When I came out, she grabbed my hair, twisted it around her fist and slammed me against the door. I fell and my nose started bleeding.

I broke out and locked myself in the closet, and my mother asked me to open it, promised that she wouldn’t beat me and apologized.

When I opened the door, she grabbed me again and dragged me into the hall, hitting me on my legs, back and head. I cried and begged her to stop, promised that I wouldn’t do this again, that I would try harder.

That day was the first time she called me a whore.

She beat me every time she was out of sorts, when I came with a bad grade, when she argued with dad or was offended by him. She said that he and I were very similar, that I was a pig just like him. She probably did this because she suspected her father of cheating and took it out on me.

I never talked about it or asked for help, I didn’t even tell my dad. One day I told a friend everything, but he just laughed and said that my mother is a wonderful woman and does everything to make me happy. I think it was because we were a very wealthy family, and he believed that such families had no problems.

I fought back for the first time when I was 18 because I was no longer afraid of her.

That day I bit her hand when she tried to grab my hair again. The beatings stopped immediately, but I realized that I would never be happy if I didn’t leave her. At the age of 20, I moved to another country, started living with my boyfriend and got married.

Now my relationship with my mother has improved, we communicate on the phone. But when I come to her, I only think about when we will fight, today or the next day.

I don't think about children yet, but I hope that I will become a good mother for them and will never cause them mental or physical pain. Although you never know about this in advance. It’s unlikely that my mother dreamed of beating me when she gave birth. It seems to me that deep down she is ashamed.

Maria, 18 years old:

It started in primary school, the first time they beat me until I was bruised with a jump rope. They could throw various things at me, knives, forks and other utensils.

I lived in fear, I was even given a choice, asking what object I would like to be beaten with.

When they beat me, I tried to scream as hard as I could so that the neighbors would hear and someone would come to help, but it was useless.

However, I strived to be better in their eyes. She studied everything that could generate income and started working early to provide for herself and her interests.

When my father was angry, he tried to hurt me not only physically, but also mentally. Between blows, he screamed that I had betrayed him, that he would never trust me. I always waited patiently for him to get tired; it would be pointless to fight back.

My parents always said that it was all my fault, that I deserved more than I got and should say “thank you” for mercy. This pleasure in their eyes scared me even more than the actions.

The beatings stopped when I turned 17, after countless suicide attempts and threats from the school about deprivation parental rights.

I still live with them, pretend that everything is fine, and don’t run into conflict. My therapist said that you don't have to love your parents. I don't love them, but I appreciate their financial contribution to me. I didn't receive anything else.

Due to physical and moral violence, for a long time I was wary of people and didn’t trust anyone. I was always expecting an attack or trick from people. Now I am tormented by convulsions and hallucinations.

In the future, I don't want parents to touch my children. They will never approach them. Let them watch, that’s why they came up with videos, video chats and Skype. My children won't learn about domestic violence on personal experience. I definitely won’t follow in my parents’ footsteps.

I'm ashamed that I don't know what family is. I have not formed a family model. Many of my peers are in relationships or getting married, and I am running from it. I never asked my parents for more than they could give me, I never asked for the impossible. I just wanted to be needed and loved.

Aitolkyn, 24 years old:

As a child, I lived quite peacefully, but when I started adolescence, my parents reacted very violently to manifestations of my character.

When I was 13 years old, my mother beat me for what she thought was a short skirt. In fact, it was just above the knee. She brutally beat me for one and a half to two hours, repeating at the same time that I was a prostitute. The reasons for the beatings were always different: she didn’t clean the house, the onions burned, she simply might not have been in the mood.

She said that if she knew what I would grow up to be, she would have had an abortion, that it would be better for me to die.

Occasionally, two or three times over the years, they asked me for forgiveness, but it was insincere, just to ease my conscience. At the same time, they told me that it was my own fault that I was beaten.

Judging objectively, I was good child. I studied well, didn’t go out, talked to good kids, didn’t use anything. I always got it for having my own opinion.

When I was in school, I was beaten once or twice a month. The older I got, the less often they beat me, but they did it more cruelly. Dad usually didn’t interfere, but sometimes he tried to stop. The last couple of years I joined myself.

Before, I didn’t resist, I just endured and asked to stop. Naturally, no one listened to me. When I was 19, I started screaming so that they wouldn’t come near me, defending myself with my hands. One day I even called the police because there was no one to protect me. For this, my parents kicked me out of the house and said that I was no longer their daughter.

The last time I was beaten was in the summer. After that, I left home, and when I returned, my mother asked for forgiveness. This never happened again. Now our relationship is stable. If some kind of quarrel starts, then I just go to my place.

I am quite nervous by nature, many years of beatings and terrible treatment towards me aggravated this.

Previously, if people next to me simply raised their hands, I covered my head with my hands - a reflex. I still flinch from any touch.

I am not confident in myself and constantly think that something is wrong with me, but I try not to dwell on it and move on with my life.

I know for sure that I will never hit my children. I don't want to continue this horror.

Zhibek Zholdasova, Candidate of Medical Sciences, psychiatrist-psychotherapist:

I have many patients who say they were abused as children. Usually adults come to me. If teenagers, then older, 17-18 years old. Children cannot go to a psychotherapist because they are constantly under the control of adults.

At school or kindergarten, such children are easy to identify. At any rise in voice, at any gesture or wave of the hand, they immediately curl up into a ball, want to hide, cover their heads with their hands. You can immediately understand that most likely this child is being beaten. Many of my patients who have experienced physical abuse behave this way into adulthood.

At the same time, if girls are emotional and sensitive, then sooner or later they will tell someone about what happened to them. Boys are more likely to hide it. In general, they go to psychologists and psychotherapists much less often. The majority of my patients are women and girls.

It happens that violence has a very negative impact on people’s future lives.

The behavior pattern is reinforced in childhood, and the person gets used to being constantly beaten. Often he then finds himself an equally abusive partner.

So girls marry men who also beat them.
As they grow up and become parents, they may begin to beat their children, thinking: “My father beat me, and I will beat you. How are you better than me? The learned behavior pattern is so strong that it can be quite difficult to change it.

Therefore, we need to talk about this. Reminding that there are other ways to educate, that physical violence is not the answer.

Perhaps not all is well in these parents’ lives. There is some kind of internal tension, a feeling of dissatisfaction, complexes, which causes the level of anger and aggression to increase. And this aggression always needs to be poured out on someone.

Physical violence in the family occurs not because the child is bad, but because the parent himself has a psychological defect.

And teenagers who are being physically abused need to contact a school psychologist; they have nowhere else to go. We need to categorically raise the level of school psychologists. Only a few school psychologists have any techniques to help them.

Zulfiya Baysakova, director of the crisis center for victims of domestic violence in Almaty:

According to the legislation of the Republic of Kazakhstan, minors cannot be placed in any government institutions without the permission of the court. In our crisis center for victims of domestic violence, parents are accommodated, that is, mothers with children.

The crisis center provides only correspondence counseling by telephone. You need to understand that any work carried out with minors must be done with the permission of guardians or parents. This makes it difficult to provide face-to-face counseling to minors on many issues. That's why we advise teenagers by calling 150, which operates 24 hours a day and on an anonymous basis. All calls are free.

Unfortunately, we do not have a single program in Kazakhstan that would be aimed at reducing and managing the level of aggression, so we are observing unjustified aggression and inappropriate behavior on the part of many people. NGOs and our crisis center are trying to develop programs to work with bullies to teach people to manage their emotions and not be violent towards anyone.

Parental violence against minors is a crime.

It is very important to correctly identify it, so we conduct seminars so that specialists working with children can clearly identify physical, psychological, economic, and sexual violence both by external signs and by the level of anxiety and fear of children.

Socially oriented work with family members is very poorly developed in Kazakhstan. Today, all work is built only on helping a victim of domestic violence, for example, a teenager, and little work is done with parents. They are held accountable, and that’s where all the work ends.

Most The best way providing assistance to minors is to invite them to call the helpline 150, where psychologist consultants can provide professional assistance.

All this happens anonymously and confidentially, which is very important for minors because they are usually intimidated and do not know who to turn to. The next tool could be school psychologists, who should work in every school. How well they can work is another question.

After collecting evidence, parents are brought to administrative or criminal liability, depending on the degree of bodily harm. If the commission on juvenile affairs considers that it is necessary to deprive parental rights, custody of the child is transferred to government agencies, and then to individuals who can work in this direction.

If you are experiencing domestic violence, you can always call the helpline 150, where they can help you.

The realization that my child was an outcast among his classmates hit me like a concrete slab. The son always avoided conversations on the topic of relationships in class, explaining the abrasions and bruises as fights common among boys. But one day, seeing a fresh bruise on my head, I threatened to tell the teacher or principal about these fights. After all, such actions can lead to unpredictable consequences!

The child’s answer simply amazed me: “Mom, they beat me every day at school, I don’t want to live. I even thought about suicide... Don’t tell anyone anything, mom, please, otherwise they’ll just kill me.” It turned out that my child was being systematically beaten at school, and not just beaten, but beaten.

The first unconscious impulse was to put these young bastards in prison. After cooling down, I realized that these boys and girls were also someone’s sons and daughters. Apparently, we need to call their parents, or should we resolve the issue through the teacher and the school principal? Where to complain, where to go and what to do when your child is beaten?

Between Scylla and Charybdis

The question was by no means simple. Parents, of course, can appeal and complain about the bullying of their son or daughter to different authorities. When your child is beaten, you will reach not only the school management, but also the Ministry of Education. But I understood that such actions could provoke classmates to double violence, and this would actually push my child to suicide. What to do?

Of course, a beaten child prefers to remain silent. But where were my eyes? After all, not every child becomes an object of bullying. Perhaps it’s me, as a mother, who is to blame for what happened? My son has his whole life ahead of him, but he is not able to adapt to the team. Maybe it's not too late to change something?

Educational program for retarded parents

After desperately rushing around parenting forums, a happy accident led me to the website on System-Vector Psychology by Yuri Burlan. Articles and recommendations from system psychologists opened my eyes to my own monstrous illiteracy. It turned out that our children inherit from us only external signs. And the child’s psyche may be completely different from the parent’s.

In order to avoid making educational mistakes, you need to know exactly what properties nature has endowed your child with. Indeed, not everyone can become a potential victim of classmates, but only those with certain mental properties. But this scenario is not at all mandatory: it all depends on how psychologically competent we raise our children.

Natural “victims”: how to survive in the modern world?

Most often, a child beaten by classmates is a carrier of the cutaneous-visual bundle of vectors. By nature, he is given a special emotionality; as a child, he feels sorry for bugs and has compassion for a homeless kitten. In primitive times, boys with such properties did not survive, but became victims of cannibalism. Naturally incapable of killing, he could not hunt like the rest of the pack, which meant he was an extra mouth and a burden.

Today we have a centuries-old cultural layer that limits our hostility. Therefore, skin-visual boys survive along with the rest. However, for the most part, their parents raise them incorrectly. As a result, such a child is constantly beaten and humiliated by his peers. What can you do to prevent your child from becoming a victim?

The main mistake of parents is trying to raise a “brutal man” from a gentle and fragile boy. So that he can stand up for himself, he is sent to various types of martial arts, etc. However, he will never be equal to those who are naturally able to “kill prey.” It is in such an environment that he feels even more like “not a man”, different from more aggressive boys. But this does not mean at all that he is a “girl”.
The sensuality of such a boy is both the cause of his problems and his main “trump card”. It all depends on upbringing. At the ancient root of his psyche lies the fear of death (being eaten). By remaining in a state of fear, he becomes a victim. But if in childhood parents read fairy tales to such a child to encourage empathy, and later teach him to help the sick and weak, his fear is transformed into its opposite - love for people.
By nature, skin-visual children have a talent for singing, they are artistic. An excellent implementation option would be to send such a boy to a music school. A playing and singing skin-visual boy with a guitar no longer becomes an outcast, but, on the contrary, the soul of the party. Around him, the guys unite no longer on the basis of hostility and aggression, but on the basis of sensual unity.
A theater club or dance school would also be a good option. Usually there are many more girls in such circles. It is in such an environment that a skin-visual boy is more likely to learn to feel like a man, in contrast to girls. You just need to teach him: give the girl a hand, help her put on a coat, etc.

If your family has not a son, but a daughter with such properties, the situation during school years may turn out differently. Such a girl is naturally the most attractive to boys; she prefers their company instead of making friends with representatives of her own sex.

However, this arouses envy and aggression towards her from other girls who modern world They also often constantly hit each other. In addition, when entering adolescence, a skin-visual girl runs the risk of being raped if she unconsciously carries fear within herself.

Educational measures to prevent such situations are the same as described above. This is the development of sensitivity, the ability to empathize and compassion, to help the sick and weak. These measures will ensure that your child is able to express his or her emotional range, forever eliminating fear and therefore the risk of becoming a victim.

Battered child "out of this world"

Skin-visual boys become victims of their peers precisely because they are not like everyone else, as if “not men.” And other boys perceive them as strangers among their own. By the same principle, girls can unconsciously bully their skin-visual classmate, because she is “not like them”, “at home” in the society of boys.

But not every class has a child with a visual-cutaneous vector bundle. Then classmates may unconsciously choose another victim. As always, it becomes the one who is different from the rest. Often this is the owner, no matter whether it is a boy or a girl.

Such children are focused on their thoughts and speak little. Their especially sensitive area is the ear, it can be difficult for them to perceive the noise and din of the rest of the children, they can withdraw into themselves and prefer solitude. Why is such a child beaten at school, how does he develop a victim scenario?

When a son or daughter with a sound vector grows up in a family, the parents themselves often make a big mistake. Seeing that the child is having a very difficult time in kindergarten or school, they strive to transfer him to home schooling, thereby further cementing the sound engineer’s inability to social adaptation.
Such children have extraordinary abstract intelligence and can often be ahead of their peers in intellectual development. WITH early years Instead of fairy tales, they read encyclopedias and are interested in “where everything came from.” This strengthens parents in their idea that their child is special and he has nothing to do among the rabid crowd.

The wrong decision to isolate their little genius from the rest is very costly for parents. For example, having not received at least minimal social adaptation in kindergarten, during school years it is precisely such a child who runs the risk of being beaten or simply becoming an object of ridicule and bullying.

Individual training leads to the fact that even with the highest intelligence, a sound engineer is not able to convey his extraordinary ideas to other people. He is not able to implement them, because in this matter it is simply impossible to do without contact with others. The lack of realization of one’s properties pushes the sound artist towards suicide; he may experience deep depression. And such a person is really capable of committing suicide to a tragic end.

What to do to avoid bullying of such a child by his peers?

IN kindergarten The zvukivika must be given at the same time as the rest of the children - at the age of about three years. Having mastered the skill of reading early, such a child can unite the whole group around him while reading fairy tales together. Then instead of being an outcast, he will be the center of attention. The main thing is to enlist the support of the teacher.
Instead of trying to involve such a child in active and noisy games, give him the opportunity to prepare some interesting report or scientific experiment for the whole class. The help of adults will allow other children to be involved in the implementation of such a project. This will help the sound artist learn to interact with others in the process of realizing his ideas.

Bullying based on other differences

Sometimes we ourselves lay the groundwork for our child to be beaten or ridiculed. For example, system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan explains that a child’s name should be chosen from those that are often found among his peers, so that it is not too pretentious.

You shouldn’t wonder what to do if your sweet daughter named Cleopatra is beaten at school among Russian-speaking children, and why she is constantly bullied. Children always find someone who is different from them in one way or another and ostracize him.

And yet, no matter what vectors and differences from other children your child may have, if he is socialized, developed according to his innate properties and knows how to create contact with others, then a situation where the child is beaten and bullied will not arise.

Today, very few teachers and parents have sufficient psychological literacy to help children build productive relationships in a team. And without the competent help of adults, children are only able to build an archetypal flock, where “an eye for an eye” and “the survival of the fittest.”

A beaten child is a murdered society

Receiving psychological trauma as a result of beating and humiliation in childhood, our children are not able to build a normal society, create happy families. We adults should start with ourselves. How to stop being nervous about a world that is so cruel to your beloved child?

If it was your child who was beaten, consider that you have already received a “one-way ticket.” The end of this journey will be either your psychological literacy or the ruined fate of your own child. The choice is yours.

Our story with my son ended happily, thanks to the training on system-vector psychology Yuri Burlan. Instead of judo, he finally went to study singing and is now just the life of the party in the first year of his institute. ours is far from unique; many training participants left their feedback on how the training helped them find the key to raising their child:

It is sometimes very difficult to notice changes in yourself. But children are our mirrors. And I have very strong connection with daughter. I was worried about this, I really wanted her to grow up not as complex as me. And no matter what I did (visits to a psychologist, books, etc., etc.), but my daughter “removed” everything from me...

And then, during my training, I began to notice changes in my daughter, she seemed to have matured (mentally), relationships with her classmates improved, she was no longer an outcast in the class, whom everyone called names. Naturally, she began to go to school with great pleasure and open up. And then I realized that I was no longer the same as I was a couple of months ago! And I feel like this is just the beginning!!!

Do you want the “ticket” to be lucky in your case? Ensure a normal future for your child by starting with free online training on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Register.

The article was written based on the training materials “ System-vector psychology»

It's evening, but it's not too late. My friend and I are walking down the street in a fairly crowded place.

Here our attention is stolen by an unpleasant situation: a young couple who was walking through the square begins to be accosted by a dubious group of five people.

Obscene language, threats and aggressive behavior from the company's side. It is clear that the guys were simply looking for a reason and for those who were not equal in strength to them.

What did we do in such a situation? Let's return to this story a little later...

What's wrong with us

Why does society ignore such situations?

Someone is afraid to help, so as not to become the same victim; someone believes that people themselves are to blame for being attacked; many are confident that someone else will help; others think that they will not be protected by the state if they harm the offender, while others are simply glad that this situation did not happen to them.

In recent years, the so-called bystander effect has become much more common in society, when people do not pay attention to the violence happening before their eyes.

The manifestation of the witness effect is clearly illustrated, where it is reported that people who became eyewitnesses tragic events, did not provide any assistance to the victims.

What the police say

The source of Facts ICTV in the National Police in the commentary indicates that in such situations you should first of all call the police.
The main thing is to clearly and quickly describe the situation and place, ideally the address where the illegal action occurs.

In addition, the senior investigator of the National Police notes that you can scare away a thief by shouting loudly and saying “I’ve already called the police!”

As practice shows, those who stage a robbery on the street hide themselves, try to steal in dark and sparsely populated places, so a scream will frighten them and most often force them to abandon their plan and run.

According to National Police statistics, in 2017, 490,280 offenses were committed in Ukraine, of which 52% were thefts and robberies.

The police solved over 60% of robbery attacks.

However, the number of robberies and crimes on the street could be much less if citizens were not so indifferent to such situations and reported them to the police in a timely manner.

Let's return to our couple, who is accosted by an aggressive company on the street. Yes, my friend and I stubbornly set out to defend the girl and the guy. And yes, we also received from an inadequate company that was looking for adventure.

However, if dozens of people who were simply passing by and clearly speeding up their pace began to be indignant, shout and also helped to stop the offenders, the situation would not have gone so far.

In addition, next time, this company, knowing that the public reaction may be such, will think three times whether to show its aggression.

You cannot be indifferent to your fellow citizens. This is education, this is civil position, which creates a responsible and strong society.

As a result

So we get that behind the so-called indifference hides a whole system of socio-psychological factors that influence a person’s perception of a certain situation.

But no matter what terms scientists use, no one has canceled “personal responsibility factor”.

Yes, each of us always has a choice of what to do when a person is offended before our eyes or someone needs help.

Moreover, the choice is not limited to physical violence against the criminal or indifference. Depending on the situation, you need to call the police, call an ambulance, find allies who will help solve the problem.

In the latter case it will be achieved group cohesion effect at its best.