MOSCOW, November 20 – RIA Novosti. About half of Russian students do not want to go to school because they dislike the teacher, Alexander Kuznetsov, president of the Association of Child Psychologists and Psychiatrists of Russia, told RIA Novosti. What difficulties schoolchildren face, how to restore a child’s motivation to learn and instill independence, experts told RIA Novosti on the eve of Children’s Day, which is celebrated on November 20.

Mom, is the weekend coming soon?

The mother of a second-grader, a student at a secondary school near Moscow, Maria Rempel did not expect that her eight-year-old son Mark might have problems with his studies. She herself was an excellent student at school, but Mark cannot yet boast of such success. First quarter of the second academic year the boy graduated with one C in Russian.

“He doesn’t like school so much that every day he asks me when the weekend will be,” Rempel told RIA Novosti.

According to the parent, her son has no desire to study because the school teacher could not interest him. “We used to come to school to learn, but now we come to show what we learned at home with our parents,” she said.

In addition, according to Rempel, school textbooks contain many complex and strange tasks that not even every adult can solve. “And the parents of a second-grader have to solve problems with collective wisdom on special forums on the Internet or by phone,” Rempel noted. As a result, it turns out that it is not the children who are more concerned about doing homework, but the parents themselves.

Study, study, study

The reluctance of a child of any age to go to school is self-defense from a heavy load, says Russian language and literature teacher, Honored Teacher of the Russian Federation Inna Golenok.

“It turns out that the child is uncomfortable, uncomfortable with what he doesn’t do, and when he starts doing everything, he also feels uncomfortable because he gets tired,” she explained.

Golenok noted that teachers' workload, associated with deficiencies in basic planning, is projected onto students. “The program is designed in such a way that sometimes one hour a week is allocated to a subject. But according to all psychological rules, there shouldn’t be one hour a week at all: knowledge is not consolidated, there is no repetition, hence the heavy workload,” says the teacher.

Director of Physics and Mathematics Lyceum N 239 in St. Petersburg, winner of the All-Russian competition "School Director-2012" Maxim Pratusevich agrees that the curriculum for modern schoolchildren is not easy. At the same time, he considers laziness main reason reluctance to study at school.

“You have little time and you need to work, but working today is not very common. Children are not accustomed to work. They say that studying must be fun in order to study well, but this is not so. Studying is hard work. We study for life, but in life you have to work hard, be able to do it,” Pratusevich said.

What do they teach at school?

Child psychologists are confident that the first teacher plays a key role in a child’s attitude towards school, who must motivate the child to learn. The President of the Association of Child Psychologists and Psychiatrists, Alexander Kuznetsov, told RIA Novosti that schools in Russia have always lacked an individual approach to each student.

“The school is focused on the average student, so there can be no talk of any individuality. It has been proven that strong students descend to the average level after two or three classes,” Kuznetsov said.

According to him, often a child does not want to go to school precisely because he does not like his teacher. Or a child goes to school not for knowledge, but just to socialize and show off in front of his peers. “We don’t like a subject for which we don’t like the teacher. From our practice, approximately 50% of children in elementary school, when asked about the teacher, answer that they don’t like the teacher,” the psychologist noted.

According to Kuznetsov, if parents want their child not to have problems learning at school, they must preserve the main thing - the child’s motivation to learn. “And not due to the fact that studying is work, this is great stupidity, but on the contrary, explaining that studying is always interesting. We need to look for ways not to kill the child’s natural curiosity for knowledge,” he noted.

The right help

The psychologist gave several practical advice parents who cannot force their child to study at school. First of all, parents should find out whether the child likes the teacher. “If your child doesn’t like the teacher, change the teacher. This could be a teacher at a neighboring school. You shouldn’t become attached to the school just because it’s closest to your home,” recommends Kuznetsov.

If you cannot find a good teacher, you can transfer your child to homeschooling. “According to the new law on education, this can be done very simply: you come to school, write an application and that’s it. Then you just need to take tests,” explained the psychologist, noting that his children, for example, have long been studying the school curriculum at home.

Homeschooling saves a lot of time and fosters independence in the child. “If a child can read, he can study the topic on his own. If he has a question, he can ask his parents or watch numerous video tutorials on the Internet,” Kuznetsov said.

Another tip is to give your child prizes so that he is motivated to complete his homework on his own. For example, children can earn the right to engage with educational apps on a tablet for twenty minutes after 8 p.m. Subsequently, the child will get used to a certain course of events, to a ritual, and will begin to do his homework on his own.

“Parents don’t understand how they can help their child do their homework. They can’t get their child to look away from the computer and spend five hours doing their homework for them. As a result, the child gets used to it and says: “Mom, it’s late, but could you do it for me?” do physics?!" The child develops such an attitude that my mother will still not let me go until I do my homework, and since she also needs to go to bed, she will eventually do everything for me, I just need to be more stupid and do less ", Kuznetsov explained.

The psychologist noted that approximately 20% of children have attention deficit disorder. “Therefore, one more piece of advice: children should be taught to rest and break complex tasks into small ones. So that the child does not feel like he is sitting at homework until he is blue in the face,” he said. To control the time of work and rest, you can use a cooking timer or an hourglass.

In the early grades, it is imperative to teach your child to read. “By instilling a love of reading, you will insure yourself against most problems in education,” says the psychologist. The simplest way teach your child to love books - show interest in what the child reads aloud to you. “We usually have very little time to hear a child. When you listen to a child, he really likes to read to an adult, especially if the adult is sincerely interested,” added Kuznetsov.

Sometimes it is important to buy textbooks for the previous grade and conduct diagnostics and determine the level at which the child copes “excellently”. “And tell the child: that’s it, at home we start learning from this level. We need to catch up with the program so that the person gets on solid ground and feels confident in the class,” said the psychologist.

But the most important rule that parents should remember is to never tell a child that he is stupid, and do not get annoyed if he does not understand something. “If you are irritated, it means you are setting high goals. Go lower. And be sure to encourage the child’s independence,” concluded Kuznetsov.

Studying makes many people despondent, but every year the problem of reluctance to attend school becomes more and more aggravated. Even first-graders, who 10 years ago were waiting for classes to start, today completely refuse to attend school. In middle grades, students go to classes without enthusiasm, and high school students are horrified by the word Unified State Exam. Each child, as he grows up, has his own reasons for not liking school. Ways to overcome this problem are different and depend on age, character, and some other characteristics, which we will discuss in the article.

Why this happens, as well as consultations with psychologists, read in this material.

Origins reluctance to learn

Psychologists advise first to figure out why the child does not want to study, and then only act. It is necessary to observe the student and his behavior, discuss the situation in a warm and friendly manner. Accusations and scolding will not help here - adults need to clearly understand that their goal is to motivate the child to actively study, and not to throw out their righteous anger. Therefore, we first understand the origins of a negative attitude towards learning, and only then look for ways to solve the difficulties that have arisen.

What to do if your child does not want to go to school

Reasons:

Features of children's temperament.
Soreness.
Hyperactivity.
Lack of motivation.
Difficulties in communicating with other students or teachers, conflicts.
Problems in the family.
Self-doubt.
Insufficient level of responsibility.
Smart, but lazy at the same time.
Strong attachment to entertainment, gadgets, games.

What to do ,

To finallyto understand the origins of the lack of desire to learn, consider each of the reasons in more detail and find ways to overcome this problem. Remember that only constructive methods of overcoming learning difficulties can help - scolding children is useless.

children do not want to go to school due to lack of motivation

1 reason is temperament

Psychologists have long distinguished 4 types of temperament:

Choleric is active, intolerant and nervous, easily excitable.
A sanguine person is sociable and lively, but at the same time diligent and efficient.
Phlegmatic – balanced and calm, easily copes with any difficulties.
Melancholic - vulnerable and touchy children, susceptible to stress and easily tired.

Of these four children's temperament types, learning is most difficult for melancholic and choleric people, since it is these children who are the most emotional. It is easiest for sanguine and phlegmatic people to gain knowledge. If schoolchildren with a strong nervous system have difficulties with their studies, then we must continue to look for the root of the problem.

What to do , if the child does not want to studyhaving a choleric or melancholic temperament:

Melancholic people.

Melancholic children have a much harder time studying than any other children. They take the slightest failures or conflicts with teachers and fellow students to heart. Melancholic people get tired very quickly, both physically and mentally.

Such a child needs to take breaks to rest and restore the body and psyche. Try to match the pace of studying and completing homework so that the load increases gradually. This way, your young schoolchild will get used to large amounts of tasks more easily and his self-esteem will grow, which is important for melancholic children.

Cholerics.

It would seem that choleric people are very different from guys with a melancholic temperament. But both of them experience difficulties with their studies. In the case of choleric children, the difficulty lies in the lack of patience and the rapid fading of interest. The parents of such a student face a difficult task - to learn how to dose his studies in such a way as to constantly maintain interest in learning. Change the assignments, for example, 30 minutes of reading homework, 30 minutes of math homework. Give your choleric a rest, let him play or even watch TV in between homework.

the child does not want to study - it is worth discussing this problem

Reason 2 – soreness

Children who have some health problems often miss classes. Because of this, many topics remain misunderstood, and catching up on missed material is not so easy. In addition, a student may begin to cheat and say that he allegedly has something in pain in order to miss classes again. Teachers often meet such students halfway and give positive grades without the appropriate knowledge.

Such children should be gently attracted to study, not scolded, and not doubted that they really feel bad.

3rd reason, – hyperactivity

Motor activity and lack of attention syndrome (ADHD) or hyperactivity is a disease of the nervous system that requires correction by a neurologist. This does not mean that students with hyperactivity and ADHD cannot attend a comprehensive school - they can and should, because their intelligence is not affected.

the child does not want to study

4th reason, – insufficient motivationto gain knowledge

The presentation of educational material by different teachers may differ significantly. Some teacher can interest any student in his subject, but in the lessons of another teacher you want to yawn.

In this case, it is necessary to interest the student, explain why this or that object is needed and how it can be useful. Help your child understand what he wants to become after graduation and what to do, then motivation and interest in studying will appear on their own.

Reason 5 – conflict situations

Difficulties in communicating with other students and a negative attitude towards some teachers happen very often. MaleIt is still difficult for any person to focus on the main thing - studying, instead of resolving and experiencing conflicts. Problems communicating with other students or even with teachers take up all your energy and time.

Parents in such a situation should help improve school relations, and to do this, find out the cause of the conflicts. Only after solving the problem with interpersonal relationships You can move on to the main thing – getting your child interested in studying.

Schoolchildren do not yet know how to separate the personality of the teacher and the subject itself. If the teacher has not found an approach to the students in the class, then no one likes to teach lessons on this subject. As in the case of a lack of motivation to learn, psychologists advise trying to interest the student, explaining how interesting and necessary this subject is. Closer to graduating classes It’s easier to do this by explaining to your child the need to receive a quality education and by going through career guidance at school.

Reason 6 – difficulties in the family

Psychologists believe that negativity in the family negatively affects the development of any little person. Both health and mental activity suffer.

If there is discord in the family, try not to involve your offspring in negative situations, protect him from quarrels and clarification of relations between spouses.

the child does not want to study - conflicts

7th reason, – self-doubt

This is one of the most common reasons. Life forces parents to set global and difficult goals for their child. And when the baby doesn’t succeed, mom and dad reproach him for it, showing their disappointment in him. Almost every parent said to their children such words as: “And Aunt Masha’s son is a medalist, and you are a C student!”, “Sveta’s neighbor is doing excellent in her studies and goes to ballet, but you can’t even do simple things!” .

Parents in this way only want to spur their offspring to conquer new heights, but the effect is the opposite. The schoolboy thinks that he can’t keep up with the medal-winning ballerina, which means there’s no point in trying.

8 reason, – insufficient level of responsibility

From the very early childhood parents take care of the baby, control his every action - and this is correct at an early stage of development. But the older the child gets, the more freedom and opportunity he should be given to make his own decisions.

If mom or dad packs a student’s schoolbag and completely controls the daily routine and homework, this is not correct. The son or daughter of such parents does not learn to make decisions on their own and always hopes for someone else. Why think about deciding everything on his own if his parents will do it for him?

Parental control is necessary, but to a certain extent. If you go too far, then instead of a responsible student motivated to study, there is a high risk of getting an uninitiated lazy person.

Reason 9 – smart but lazy

There are children for whom studying comes very easily. They only need to flip through the textbook to understand the subject. But the catch is that such a student becomes uninterested in listening to the teacher and completing assignments. As a result, grades leave much to be desired, and in the worst case, the student misses new topics, the material on which is then difficult to understand on his own.

10 reason – addiction to games, entertainment, gadgets

All kinds of addictions are the scourge of our time. The available entertainment in the form of a computer and telephone has become too much to avoid. Yes, school lessons are increasingly becoming related to computer technology.

In this case, it is necessary to clearly distinguish between time for study and time for rest. It is worth entering into an agreement with the student that he will be allowed to play on the computer only after completing his homework.

What to do if a child does not want to study – general recommendations and advice from psychologists depending on the age of the children

why does a child not want to go to primary school?

What to do if your child doesn’t want to study V primary school

The most common reasons why babies refuse to walk primary school– this is a reluctance to wake up early, do homework, fear of a formidable teacher. Also new children's group may cause concern.

At the very beginning of training, treat your child as if adapting to kindergarten - put your common photo in his briefcase, allow him to take his favorite toy to play with it during breaks.
Meet the teacher in advance and watch cartoons and books about the student’s daily routine. Let the young student know what to expect during class.
Rehearse getting ready for school and homework through the game. As tasks for such training, you can give real tasks in copybooks or in an ABC book. During the game, change roles - let the child be the teacher, give orders and scribble in red ink - this will reduce the fear of bad grades and the teacher.
There is no need to scold a first grader for bad grades. It’s better to network together and try to sort out the mistakes and show the correct solutions to the tasks.
As an incentive at the end of the school week, you can go with the student to entertainment activities– to the cinema or an entertainment center for children. In higher grades, you can also reward a student, but for good grades, and not just for attending classes.

What to do if your child doesn’t want to study in high school

Opinion According to psychologists, the reluctance of children aged nine to twelve to study comes down to the presence of conflict situations with teachers or classmates. At this age, the child is still highly dependent on the opinions of others, but is already showing his own “I” and character.

First of all, you need to talk to the student and find out whether this is really a conflict situation. It is also worth discussing this situation with the teacher, finding out his point of view and getting recommendations on ways to solve the problem. A teacher can become an excellent educational assistant, because he has enormous practical experience in establishing relationships with a wide variety of students.

Try to protect your offspring from domestic conflicts. Any person, especially a small one, should have confidence that their parents will always understand, help and support, no matter what happens.

Don’t forget about rewards for good studies - the carrot and stick method has not been canceled, but very often parents forget about rewards when punishments are not long in coming.

Those problems with socialization that seem funny and stupid to you are extremely important for young schoolchildren. Parents should in no way mock or devalue their child’s experiences.

What to do if your child doesn’t want to study V adolescence after 12 years

Although in At this age, interpersonal communication problems with peers become most acute; psychologists identify another main reason for the lack of desire to learn - meaningless and uninteresting subjects.

Between the ages of 13 and 17, students decide on their future profession and education. They additionally study in areas necessary in the future; parents pay for tutors. Therefore, those subjects that will not be useful to them in life and, most importantly, when entering a secondary or higher educational institution, turn out to be unnecessary and uninteresting.

But at this age it is already possible to explain to children why they need education and non-core subjects. A teenager is able to realize that without a broad outlook, which comes from studying all school subjects, it is difficult to succeed in life. In addition, everything in life can change dramatically several times, and then the lessons that are currently uninteresting will come in handy.

We must not forget about properly stimulating interest in learning. Reward your child for good grades - this method works great.

Results

Unfortunately, the modern education system is structured in such a way that the bulk of difficulties in learning and overcoming them falls on the shoulders of parents. If not you, then no one will explain to your offspring the need to receive a decent education. No one but you will interest him in his studies.

Most often, the reason is on the surface - the child is simply too lazy to get up early, get ready and generally study. In such a situation, he simply lacks discipline. To help a student cope with his own laziness, you need to come up with daily rituals for him.

“They are important for a child from infancy,” explains the psychologist. Tatyana Yurieva, – and give the baby a feeling of security. As you grow older, rituals turn into habits, on which adult life largely depends.”

Tatyana recommends coming up with a sequence of actions that the child will perform every day. This regime will help you get used to school and reduce resistance. So moms and dads really need to be reminded to fold their briefcase, brush their teeth, and go to bed at a certain time.

As a rule, laziness appears because the child lacks motivation. “Why should I go to school?” is a question that every parent has heard at least once.

The psychologist believes that motivation will not appear if you do not work with children.

“There are no miracles. If you don’t teach your child a routine and don’t take him to classes before school, don’t expect him to wake up on September 1st charged with motivation to study. Tune in to instill in him a desire to learn. You can also motivate with gifts, drawing an analogy with the work of adults.”

Over time, each parent develops his own approach to how to convince his son or daughter that he needs to go to school. Lyudmila Semyonova, mother of a 7 year old Vani and 12 year old Egor, believes that the main thing is to explain that the knowledge acquired at school will be needed in later life.

“The eldest is sometimes lazy to study, the youngest will just start first grade, but when asked if he wants to go to school, he answers “not really.” For first-graders, the last year in school is very important. kindergarten. We had good teachers who prepared him well for school. To overcome the laziness of my sons, I say that school is important stage in life, which will help you decide on a profession and continue your education,” says Lyudmila.

Photo by Natalia Malykhina

For first-graders who are frightened by an unknown school, the psychologist advises telling stories about school.

"In them main character may not want to go to school at first, but then fall in love with learning. Stories that old friends will be there or new ones will appear will also help. It’s better to get used to the school routine in advance. Take them to prepare for school so that the child gets used to the place and activities,” adds Tatyana Yuryeva.

“They offend me there”

Sometimes the reason may be bad relationships with classmates or teachers. A withdrawn child most likely will not even tell his parents that his classmates are offending him.

“Draw a parallel with your life: if you have difficult relationships with colleagues, do you want to go to work? Communication barriers, inability to find a common language with new people, conflicts, misunderstandings, child cruelty - all this can discourage the desire to go to school for a long time,” notes the psychologist.

Tatyana Yuryeva draws attention to the fact that it is important not to overdo it with protecting the child. Indeed, there are such difficult situations when you need to change classes or even schools. But the child must learn to cope with difficulties, so in non-critical situations it is better to help find a common language with teachers and classmates.

“Our whole life is often determined by communication skills. If you teach a child with early age Finding a common language with others will give him a very important life skill. If you yourself have difficulties communicating, seek the help of professionals: involve child psychologists, school psychologists, take them to groups social adaptation", adds Tatiana.

In addition, it is worth talking with teachers, who will tell you what problems the child has in the team. Children can behave completely differently at home and in the classroom, so an outside perspective is important. Russian language teacher Irina Golubeva advises parents to be able to look at children’s conflicts from a detached perspective:

“Remember Solomon’s ring with the inscription “all things pass” - any conflict will be resolved sooner or later. You can benefit from any trouble if you do not take the position of a victim and do not blame others for what happened. Any crisis is personal growth.”

Photo by Natalia Malykhina

Another piece of advice is to enroll your child in a club or section that he has long wanted to join. This way your child will have another circle of acquaintances and a favorite pastime.

“Hobbies will serve as a source of positive emotions. When a person develops, discovers talent, and experiences success, he becomes more confident and self-esteem increases. This is how a child who is bullied at school develops immunity to attacks from classmates,” says Irina.

“I can’t cope”

Often adults strive to make their unfulfilled dreams come true in children. Such parents may not take into account the abilities and desires of their own child. As a result, the student fails to meet the standards set, and this also results in a reluctance to learn.

“Very often parents want their child to become a child prodigy. To do this, they send children to prestigious schools with in-depth programs, without paying special attention to their capabilities and desires. As painful as it may be, sometimes it is necessary to admit that the child does not cope with a complex program. Instead of surrounding him with tutors and extracurricular activities, maybe you should think about changing classes or schools? – says Tatyana Yuryeva.

In addition, the child’s reluctance to wake up early in the morning and go to class may be due to objective fatigue. To prevent it from accumulating, you need to ensure active rest.

"Playing computer games, the child does not rest. The brain is still overloaded with information and its processing. On weekends, take days off from studying. Walk with your child and let him run and jump,” explains the psychologist.

After a long rest, for example summer holidays, don’t expect children to quickly get into school mode. Remember how you get used to your work schedule after a vacation.

Photo from personal archive

Another reason why a son or daughter may not cope with school is neurological difficulties.

“Children can be restless and inattentive due to neurological problems that are not corrected in a timely manner. Impaired blood circulation, intracranial pressure, and immaturity of the nervous system may physically prevent the child from coping with increased mental stress. Of course, the elimination of neurological problems must be addressed from birth, but better late than never,” notes the psychologist.

Warm words and understanding

In any situation, no matter what your child finds himself in, support him.

“Support creates a sense of security, without which he cannot survive.” modern world. No matter how busy you are, take time to listen to your child. Be interested first of all not in his grades at school, but in his inner experiences. Don't skimp on kind words and hugs, because with the support of loved ones you can overcome any difficulties,” advises Irina Golubeva.

Psychologist Tatyana Yuryeva also recommends being attentive: contact should be established with the child from a very young age, so that it will not be so difficult in adolescence. It is also important to remember that your child is an individual, so you should not stop him from making his own decisions.

“Allow your child to be a separate person, not a part of you. Allow you to make mistakes and gain experience. This, of course, is not easy, but the sooner you recognize a separate personality in your son or daughter, the greater the chances of maintaining a truly close relationship,” the psychologist sums up.

Also read the material Olga Mushtaeva about how to correctly create a schoolchild’s daily routine.

Natalia Malykhina

Why doesn't the child want to study? He’s not just lazy, he allows himself to fail to learn a lesson, to cheat from a neighbor, to get out of it using a hint. The student actively resists any attempt to force him to study, and goes to any lengths to avoid doing his homework. Such children become a “headache” for the teacher at school, turning the lives of their parents and loved ones into hell, not to mention the fact that their own children’s life also becomes like hard labor.

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Kapshitar V. A.

educational psychologist

WHY DON'T CHILDREN WANT TO STUDY?

One of the fundamental principles of psychology states that all functions and abilities of a child and, in general, a person develop in the process of activity and communication with other people.

If we take into account the bulk of children with average abilities and moderately gifted children, then the main factors determining their development will beactivity and communication.

For a preschooler, the leading activity is play. It is in the process of play that the child develops attention, imagination, and voluntary control of his behavior. If a 5-6 year old child is deprived of play and fully included in work activities, even if feasible, this will lead to developmental delays or some kind of distortion. The normal development of a preschooler cannot occur within this activity. Its elements must be present in a child’s life, but it should not replace play.

For children school age study becomes the leading activity. Of course, this does not mean that she should be the only one. Guys junior classes They play with pleasure, high school students get involved in work. These types of activities are present to one degree or another in the life of a student. But only one is leading - study. It is she who shapes and defines him mental development. You can play games as much as you like and with pleasure, but games no longer develop his functions and abilities as much as they used to. The elements labor activity may be useful as pieces of tomorrow interspersed into today's life, but they do not yet play a decisive role in the development of memory, thinking, attention, and control of behavior. The need to change the leading type of activity does not strictly fit into age boundaries. To some it comes earlier, to others later. For adults, work activity is also not the only activity. IN free time Adults can have their own games, but for many of us, learning, especially in the sense of advanced training, continues throughout our entire adult life, with some interruptions. But personality development occurs in the process of work, in the course of relationships with other people.

Where does the reluctance to learn come from?

When a child enters school, the leading activity changes: play gives way to study. This means that a child who does not want to learn resists and protests against this change. For particularly difficult children, this process lasts for years. A normally raised child is still in preschool age knows many restrictions, has ideas about what is prohibited and what is dangerous, what is necessary and what is harmful. But even for such a child, most of his time is free. It is dedicated to the game, and adults, as a rule, do not interfere with it. The child is free in the game. His will is practically unlimited. He does what he wants. But this is if the child is raised normally and is healthy. If a child is not educated already at 3-4 years old, then he is already free not only in the game, but also outside of it. His behavior is not prohibited even in cases where his behavior causes protest among many adults. He early realizes that his will is the law for those around him. The child gets used to doing what he wants, even when one of the adults does not like it.

And suddenly - school. The usual way of life is changing dramatically. You can no longer do what you want in class. Whether you want to fulfill the teacher’s demands or not is of no interest to anyone. Children quickly learn that school is a place where the rules are different than at home. Whether you like it or not, you must obey these orders. Until recently, a child could do what he wanted at home, but he had to sit down and write. Studying from the very beginning requires effort from the student, comparable to the work of adults in production.

Intellectual passivity is one of the most common cases leading to reluctance to learn. It usually occurs as a reaction to very neglected material; the student simply ceases to understand what is happening in the lesson. He gives up, and he no longer wants to try to at least partially understand what is happening, or to think, or to work mentally at all. The reluctance to work mentally and strain develops into a habit. Intellectual passivity develops. The flip side is the reluctance to learn. Neglect of material sometimes occurs as a result of absences from classes - the student was sick a lot or changed his place of residence. If you do not intervene in time, the action will turn out to be either unformed or formed with some defect.

Three points of view on the motivation of a child’s educational activity.

Firstly, this long-term and short-term motivation.At the age of seven, when a child comes to school, he knows why he needs to study. Knowing that you need to get a specialty, help mom and dad, etc. should be an incentive to study. This, from the point of view of adults, is logical and undeniable. But at this age, distant motivation has practically no effect on human behavior.Short motivation– a close result is what determines the child’s behavior.

Another point of view is that the child is encouraged to learncognitive motive.The child is driven by the joy of learning. Indeed, when a book, in fact, was a source of knowledge, there was no TV or computer, tablet or phone, the path of knowledge lay through school. But today children come to school with a different supply of information. It turns out that children have already heard about everything interesting, at least half an ear, and the bright joy of knowledge is left to the multiplication table, conjugating irregular verbs and other not very exciting things.

Finally, the third point of view. She brings out the student's motivation insocial sphere.According to this point of view, the child’s desire to study well is supported by the attitude of others. But it’s not so easy to force yourself to do something, even very pleasant to those around you, if you don’t fully understand and feel why you need it yourself.

So, the effect of distant motivation is unjustified, the cognitive components and the beneficial influence of others are greatly exaggerated. Thus, children often believe that school is a place where they force you, where they assign you work and make your life miserable if you don’t complete it. Of course, this judgment is too categorical, but it is very accurately applicable to some part of the children. These are children who attend school but do not want to learn. The picture we get is when a child doesn’t want to study yet, but his parents, teachers, and school principal want it for him. Together they try to do everything possible to help the child. But the child does not want to study, because it is difficult for him to study. Those who are trained to overcome difficulties will cope, but those who are not trained or poorly trained will not. If a child from an early age is accustomed to doing what is necessary, and not just what he wants, then he will cope with the bitterness of learning.

What should parents do to make the transition from play to study less painful? And is it necessary to do anything at all?

Fortunately, now everything fewer parents who believe that their child’s education rests entirely on the shoulders of the teacher. But parents have a rather vague idea of what exactly to do.

The first task of parents is to help the child learn a new activity. For a child, even one who attended a good kindergarten, with exciting activities, learning activities are still unusual. When starting to engage in it, the child constantly makes mistakes that are completely unthinkable from an adult point of view. For example, not only in the first, but also in the second and third grades there are children who first do an exercise and then learn the rule for which the exercise is assigned. Sometimes it is enough to watch the child for a while to suggest a simple technique. After all, studying is such an unusual activity for a child that mistakes are simply impossible to predict. If you don't pay attention to them, they can take hold and turn into incorrect work practices. All these errors, as a rule, are quite clearly visible to the adult eye. To detect them, you don’t need to be a teacher or psychologist—it’s enough to pay attention to the child. But adults do not pay sufficient attention to this. Incorrect work methods will lead to failure in studies, and if this becomes a stable phenomenon, to the emergence of an aversion to learning.

It must be remembered that no matter how difficult family circumstances may be, the child continues to grow and develop. This process cannot be stopped for a minute. And everything that is not done for him in a timely manner (no matter what the circumstances) will be difficult to make up for, and maybe simply impossible.

Help from teachers and parents

The child needs help from the teacher. Help from parents is also needed. And one help does not replace another. The first common mistake parents make is to replace the student in work either at the execution stage or at the control stage. The second mistake is a misleading assessment of the child. Parents who are helping their child forget to maintain contact with the teacher. The principle of unity of requirements is violated.

An area of work that parents should not lose sight of is organizing the education of a child who has recently entered school. This is the development of the habit of rigorous and systematic preparation of lessons. Whatever happens, lessons must be learned. There is no excuse for unprepared lessons, and there cannot be - this must be made clear to the little schoolchild. This point is perhaps the most important among preventive measures. Of course, there will be difficulties in learning, but they will not develop into an unwillingness to learn. How to achieve this goal? Lessons should not be postponed or rescheduled several times at the request of the student. Doing homework should be accompanied by developing an approach to lessons as an important and serious matter that evokes respect from adults. This is where we need to start. It is important to make it clear that the importance of lessons is on a par with the most serious matters of adults. To do this, you must meet some conditions:

Even at preschool age, a child should be taught that when parents are busy, they should not be disturbed;

Instilling respect for mental work.

What can you advise parents when their reluctance to learn has become persistent?

Everything that was missed then must be done now. But this will not be easy to do. Everything will have to be done under extremely unfavorable conditions and with slow results. Now this will take months, not weeks. The older the student, the more difficult it is to influence him. This is already a fully formed person, capable of selecting influences on him. He withdraws from some and blocks them, while he opens up to others (the period when the child begins to realize the advantages and disadvantages and begins to engage in self-education). This circumstance must be taken advantage of, turning the student from an enemy into an ally.

Direct measures are ineffective. It must be remembered that the student is also the suffering party. He does not know how and does not want to study, and is in constant conflict with teachers and parents. He is the butt of jokes in the class. At such moments, the student is happy to accept the hand extended to him. At this moment he is open, does not try to isolate himself from elders with rudeness or silence.

The home environment (learning and personal space) also plays a big role.

class (coziness, comfortable furniture, uncrowded space, useful things and modern information equipment). That environment that not only teachers, but also parents try to create for their children.

The emergence of a student’s reluctance to study is, unfortunately, a common unpleasant case. It is easier for parents to resist his nature than school teacher. Of course, in matters of education and development there are no recipes suitable for all occasions. All cases are individual. Therefore, any recommendations cannot replace the need to think for yourself and solve your educational problem in all its uniqueness.

Suggest something positive. Don't be scared by future troubles.
Be patient. Give your child time to learn new things.
Respect your child's right to privacy. If a child is afraid of you, he will lie.
Tell your child that he is brave, hardworking, smart, resourceful, dexterous, neat, thinking, loved, needed, irreplaceable...
More often, let your child do what he wants, not you.
Give your child a break from your suggestions. He needs some freedom to grow up independent.
Praise and encourage your child often. Adults often do not notice something good, but immediately react to mistakes and misdeeds.
Believe in your child!
Give more independence in household chores, assign mandatory housework, and ask for it to be done as an adult.
Build positive self-esteem: “I am smart,” “I am brave,” “I can do anything.”
Love your child for free! Be his friend!
Talk through the situation: if there are quarrels, how should we get out of them (don’t be silent, don’t sit in corners, don’t be offended).
Do not immediately react sharply to protest or be rude.
Maintain the same eye level with your child when communicating (talk and interact without running or standing).
Don't read morals. When you read them, you want to close your ears.
Remember suggestibility (words - thoughts).

Find constantly bright sides character of the child, and there will be hope for the future. Eliminate control for a while, close your eyes to the disorder, change your attitude towards rudeness - at first there will be an aggravation, but you must persevere, this is a test for parents, and you must work on yourself first of all.

Remember the impact of the nature of the relationship with parents on the child's self-esteem. Behavioral disorder is a healthy reaction of a child’s sensitive psyche to painful circumstances; it is a signal - “I feel bad, help!” The child must be sure that in you he has not a judge, but an assistant who understands him. And without you, there will be enough people who will evaluate it one way or another.

Forgive failures, be patient, fair, attentive. Work on yourself. It is very important to praise and hug your child first thing in the morning. This is an advance for the whole long and difficult day!

Have faith and patience, and you will succeed!

I wish you good luck!

“The student is capable. But he doesn’t want to study!”

We continue to discuss difficult stories from school and extracurricular life in our pedagogical consultation. Today, the subject of conversation was a letter from Yekaterinburg, dedicated to one of the most pressing topics for modern schools - the topic of a teenager running away from school to the Internet. The consultation is conducted by Doctor of Psychology Alexander LOBOK and psychologist Irina KHRISTOSENKO.
We are waiting for your stories. The address where anyone can contact with their questions and their stories:
http://www.lvolab.msk.ru/lvo/forum/index.php?f=117/

The story I want to tell about is quite typical for modern teenagers. A 10th grade student, let's call him Roman, doesn't want to study. He goes to school, attends lessons, does not conflict with teachers, and yet fails in many subjects. Teachers tried different methods to solve the problem: some firmly demanded that the material be retaken after lessons, they left it until they had learned it, then they fell behind because they decided that you wouldn’t get anything out of it anyway. Others acted through parents, invited them to school, and demanded that urgent measures be taken. But parents cannot influence the situation, they have good relationship with the child, they strive to explain to him that he is studying for himself, in order to be successful in the future. ...Roman, of course, is developing and does it with great desire and interest, mastering new Internet technologies and services. But at the same time he does not think to connect his future profession. Now he is interested in friends, communication on the Internet, and the computer. He is quite successful in games and talks about it with great desire. A future life seems quite vague to him. When asked why he doesn’t study, Roman replies that preparing lessons takes too much time and he doesn’t have enough time for anything else. It's better not to do them at all. Still the result is the same. Please advise where is the way out in this situation? How to increase educational motivation in teenagers?

Tatyana Keleeva, Ekaterinburg

Alexander Lobok:
Let’s firstly figure out what “doesn’t want to study” means.
“Friends, communication on the Internet, computer” - these are the areas in which Roman is interested. This means that its formation still occurs in the listed zones. It changes, grows, develops in these zones. He's finally learning! True, he is not learning what the school requires of him. And this is precisely what teachers and parents see as the main problem. It’s not that Roman is “not being educated”, but that he is “educating in the wrong direction” – not where the curriculum requires.
But is it really that bad? It's impossible to say for sure. If Roman is truly passionate about the computer, if he does not get stuck on all sorts of primitive things, but is actively developing in the computer environment, one should only be happy about this. Why do we think that a computer is only an “escape from real problems”? Why do we believe that the general direction educational development child is preparing homework?
Now, if Roman had no educational interests at all, if he was in a state of deep educational depression (which, alas, happens with our children), it would be truly sad. But Roman’s situation is completely different! And the wise position of adults may be to learn to interact with Roman on his educational territory.
And the first vector of possible work (for both parents and teachers) is to start joint research activities with Roman about how much his educational resource is expanding and strengthening day by day in the process of this communication, games and travel on the Internet.
What’s the point of once again asking the question: “Why didn’t you study biology again today?” But the question is: “What have you learned from the Internet?” – may turn out to be very, very constructive.
In other words, we must proceed from those natural motives that Roman has. After all, he doesn’t mark time. And if the adult world (parents and teachers) becomes interested in this real promotion of Roman in the Internet sphere, it will be a platform for dialogue and mutual enrichment. You just need to understand: this will require teachers and parents to spend a certain amount of time and soul. But the law is simple: if we do not have the resources to understand the interests of a growing teenager (what he needs), he certainly will not have the resources to understand our interests (what we need).
When we say: “The child is only interested in communication, the computer and the Internet,” these are too general words. Millions of children surf the Internet day and night, but all these children have completely different interests. And the more we, adults, are interested in what exactly and to what extent interests a child on the Internet, the more seriously and differentiated we enter into the structure of his real interests, the more chances we will have for interaction and mutual understanding with this child. The more chances we will have to help him build an individual project educational activities both online and at school.
Of course, if we really want to help the child and not push him away from ourselves. And this is primarily the task of the parents, who are obviously closer to Roman. But it is also a possible task for teachers - if teachers are truly concerned about Roman’s future fate.
The second vector of work is related to the position and capabilities of school teachers.
When Roman says: “Preparing lessons takes too much time, there’s not enough time for anything else. It's better not to do them at all. The result is still the same” - this is not only about Roman.
Look: a child who has “dropped out” of the educational process at some point begins to try, but... the teacher does not notice this. The teacher is not ready to be happy that the child has made at least some effort towards the school process, and is not ready to mark this with a positive assessment (not necessarily in a journal - at least with words of emotional support). But any child wants to be supported at least a little in his efforts. He accomplishes a small feat - he breaks away from his interest and sincerely tries to do what the adults want from him. But the teacher is not ready to notice this. He is not ready to support efforts alone - he needs some visible result. But it takes time for visible results. And the teenager’s impulse fades away. Who's to blame? Alas, not a teenager. And the one who has taken upon himself to be a teacher.
Unfortunately, this is the great problem of our school: for teachers, assessment is a way of comparing children with each other, and not a way of helping the child see the effectiveness of his movement.
But if we want to truly help children like Roman, we need to learn to get out of the usual voice, when assessment is a way of ranking the children sitting in the class. You need to learn to evaluate not the number of mistakes made, but the amount of effort made. Learn to evaluate the very fact of effort. As if we were dealing with a child who has some kind of organic disorder: “Hurray! You've taken the first step! This is a huge victory, and we are ready to support you in this!!!” And I assure you: the child will respond to such support. You just need to understand that this requires a lot of patience. Both from parents and teachers.

Irina Christenko:
“The child does not want to study!” This is how parents see the situation, this is how teachers see the situation. And therefore, soul-saving conversations are held with the child about the future, which, according to the plan, should make him come to his senses and intensify his educational activities. And to the psychologist with the same question – about increasing educational motivation. And the essence of the question is simple: how to force a child to take a learning position in that world of school knowledge that seems super important in the adult world?
The easiest way to advise is to leave Roman alone - they say, he will figure out what is really important for him and what is unimportant. Moreover, his educational interests are by no means lost - school knowledge simply does not fall into their sphere.
But I still want to help parents and teachers and try to answer the question of what happened to Roman - why he dropped out of the educational process. Moreover, this situation is quite typical - thousands of teenagers find themselves in it.
And the first assumption that arises: maybe it’s not that Roman doesn’t want to study, but that he can’t study? More precisely, he cannot study the way others expect from him? And, unable to cope with the expectations, he retreats more and more into the world in which he is truly successful?
Watch how the teenager himself fixes the problem. He tried to mobilize himself to study, but he still didn’t succeed. His efforts were not noticed. Not appreciated. And no one responded, no one tried to help. It’s as if adults don’t even imagine that Roman might be having a hard time, that he might need real help. Like, the only thing is that Roman “doesn’t want to.” After all, where he “wants” - in computer programs, on the Internet - he succeeds in everything.
It seems that the teachers are let down in their assessment of the situation by the fact that Roman is an undeniably capable boy with a pronounced inclination towards intellectual leadership. And probably just recently he was a very, very successful student and his studies came easily to him. But then adolescence arrived, and something broke in the well-oiled mechanism of interaction between the boy and school, and teachers and parents, accustomed to an obedient and successful student, are ready to blame everything on the notorious “decline in educational motivation” and the malicious Internet. Like, it’s all about Roman’s lack of determination to study and strong-willed efforts. And even when Roman directly says: “I’m trying, but I can’t!” - they don’t hear him. The inertia of perception is stronger.
But let's try to reconstruct what happens to a student prone to leadership when he enters adolescence.
The dominant feature of adolescence is respect among peers, and one of the conditions for achieving high status in the modern teenage environment is, of course, to become an expert in computer matters. And this requires oh-oh-oh what efforts!
True, adults have the illusion that it is easy for modern children to master a computer, that it is difficult for adults, and does not require any special expenses from children. In reality this is, of course, not the case. It’s just that this world is extremely valuable for children, and they are ready to make enormous efforts to master it. And parents often do not even suspect how much time it takes for a child to master certain computer resources. And that at some point he is objectively forced to sacrifice school in order to make his computer breakthrough. The child does not have enough resources to be successful on two fronts at once. And naturally, he sacrifices the school front line, believing that the time will come and he will catch up with the school curriculum.
But when the time comes and he makes an effort towards school, it turns out that his own resource is no longer enough. Need a request for adult help. But the child is accustomed to leadership, and adults are confident that “everything is easy” for him. And they are not ready to appreciate the efforts made by the child due to the high level of expectations.
And then yesterday’s successful student prefers to take the position of a school slob: try, don’t try, the result is the same! The role of a loser is unbearable - the role of a conscious slob is better. Like, I’m not studying because I can’t, but because I’ve given up on your studies!
But adults must understand that this is a purely defensive position!
And that if, for at least six months, we begin to provide such a child with systematic, meaningful assistance, he will be able to emerge from the educational failure and will be able to combine his computer success with academic success. And then the mask of a slob will no longer be needed - after all, Roman is clearly a capable child with high intellectual potential.